Enduring a Stormy State of Mind

When I used to get hiccups as a kid, my father would tell me the best way to get rid of them was to wait for the next one.  Surprisingly, more often than not, it actually worked – almost as though inviting in the very thing I wanted to avoid had a way of ushering it out.  As I reflected on the previous week, I realized that I used a similar tactic a few days ago to help me shift out of a very negative state into a more positive one.

It was a tough morning.  My body didn’t want to get out of bed, and even after I managed to get up it felt heavy and encumbered.  My mind matched that state, and everything I turned my attention on seemed to be darkened by a black fog that followed me everywhere I went.  In contrast, it was a gorgeous day outside.  No clouds, a cool bright morning, birds singing, etc., etc.  I decided to go out there and see if it might lift my spirits a bit.

I made myself go running, though I would rather have sat staring zombie like into a cup of coffee.  It was harder than usual and the first several minutes of stiffness that usually give way to a state of flow felt more like an eternity.  I run because I enjoy it, I reminded myself.  But really I just wanted the whole excursion to be over.

I recalled my brother and me on boating outings with our grandparents when we were kids.  Every once in a while, we would anchor the boat near a shore where long, wild reeds would grow and the ground beneath the water would release stinky bubbles of putrid gas when our toes sunk deeply into the soft, squishy mud.  The more we stirred our feet the more rank the odor became.  I laughed as I realized that this foul stench was the closest thing I could think of to compare the state of my mind to at that very moment.

And then I began to become amused.  I was able to distance myself from the state itself and simply observe it, in much the same way that I observe and muse over my children when they wake up grouchy – these precious, sweet little souls who can behave like little %*#*’s at times.  I can be amused with them because I know eventually it will pass.  And in that moment I knew the same thing was true of my own condition.

So I just gave myself to it.  Rather than resisting, I let the negativity bubble up inside of me and just take everything over.  But as I did, try as I might, there was a bigger, stronger part of me that was completely unaffected.  It was the part of me that was observing the whole thing.  The more entertained I became, the less of a foothold those foul emotions and thoughts had.  By the end of my run, I felt calmer, freer, and experiencing a far more productive and constructive state of mind.

We will all have moments when the skies of our minds seem to darken, when the very thing someone did yesterday that didn’t affect us at all will annoy the hell out of us, when even blue skies and babies fail to bring smiles to our faces.  But these moments will eventually  pass.  We need to realize that these states of mind are just that – states.  They pass just like the weather.  And sometimes the best thing we can do is simply allow ourselves to sit in the heart of the storm and watch.  If we can do this for ourselves, we can do this for others too.  Perhaps in this way, we can identify with the part of them that is stronger than the turbulences they are experiencing so that they can do the same for themselves.

Having weathered the storms of our minds, we can appreciate even more deeply the beauty of the clear, clean freshness that follows – and use it as a backdrop on which to create our own rainbows.

Copyright Synchronistics Coaching & Consulting 2010.  All rights reserved.