Do it because you LOVE it

 

This week’s video was recorded in the spur of the moment – when I was hit with an epiphany about what allows people to be both successful AND happy. It felt worth sharing, despite the background noise and absolute lack of makeup.

When you click on the image below, you’ll be taken to my LinkedIn page, where the video is posted.

While you’re there, connect with me if you haven’t already. It would be wonderful to have you as part of my professional network.

Here’s to happiness and success – and doing what you love because you love it!

Diane

Unexpected lessons from my cable guy

 

It was one of those days where I had way more to do than time to do it. And my internet was out. The cable guy showed up early and I was happy to see him, though I knew from previous experience this likely wouldn’t be a quick process.

David had a twinkle in his eye and a familiar way about him. Though I hadn’t ever met him, you would never have known that from the way he interacted. He made casual banter while going about his work disconnecting cords and dismantling equipment, the way someone who could do it in his sleep would.

He mused philosophical, reflecting on what a waste of energy getting worked up in traffic is and letting something that bothers you fester and occupy the space of your day. Then he went on to demonstrate in his own unique way what coming back to seize the simplicity of the moment looks like as he continued to troubleshoot the equipment.

Though my cluttered mind reminded me of all the things I could (should?) be doing while he took care of the job he was there to do, something led me to mentally set it all aside and join him in his reverie.

David told me stories of conversations he’d had with other customers who had apparently done the same – people who were getting all spun up had found ways to release their angst and see things differently after simply engaging with him. He relayed stories of being in the service and having the same kind of interactions with his comrades and superiors.

And he shared a conversation he’d recently had with his daughter, who was frustrated about the unusual quantity of rain we’d been getting over the last several days.

He paused to show me a picture on his phone of what appeared to be a placid lake softly reflecting the moon and stars and colored lights that hovered around it the way an impressionist’s painting would portray. It was a comforting scene of peace and tranquility.

“My daughter loves this,” he said. And I loved it too.

When his daughter had finished lamenting the inconvenience of the rain, he reminded her of that picture – something he had sent her a day or two earlier. And he explained that it was a reservoir they both drove by all the time, a sight which was quite unremarkable when it was dry.

He pointed out that the picture she loved was full of the very rain that was bringing her down.

David’s face beamed as he put his phone back in his pocket and returned his attention to testing the new equipment he had just installed, his work in my space almost done.

Every once in a while, someone or something comes along to bring you back to a place of presence. It’s an experience that interrupts the automatic and unconscious patterns that keep us from seeing beyond the mundane, trap us in our heads, and have us running to do things we’ve completely disconnected from without even realizing it.

David did that for me on that day. And I often reflect on the experience as a reminder that the people we interact with, the things we do, the very routines we engage with every day have a level of depth and beauty that we all too easily miss. That is, unless we make the decision to open our eyes, our hearts, and our minds to see beyond appearances and be in the moment.

Thank you David Rogers, for reconnecting me with the power of presence and perspective – and changing the trajectory of a day that may have otherwise had me racing to the end in a haze that would keep me from remembering what I even did.

And also, thank you for fixing my internet.

Want to do more? Start by doing less.

 

Want to Do More? Start by Doing Less

We are a goal driven society that is conditioned to seek more.

Our egos desire more money, more fame and prestige, and more stuff. But a deeper part of ourselves longs for more peace, more meaning, and more purpose in our lives. We want to move beyond our previous realizations of what we’ve already accomplished to master newer, better ways of doing things – whether that be what we create in our lives or in our organizations – and as leaders what we can inspire others to do as well.

What if you started with less instead of more?

Just for a moment, consider what you need to let go of to create the space for something new to come in.

You can take your cues from nature. We are officially in the first week of fall – a time of letting go and preparing for regeneration.  Trees shed their leaves, and the energy of plants is directed toward developing a strong root system that’ll help it make it through the winter.

As the days will grow shorter and we spend more time in the dark, it’s fitting to reflect on things you may not be able to see but feel welling up within you.

What are you holding onto that has run its course?

• What are the old, outmoded ways of doing things that no longer bring you energy?
• What things have you acquired that you no longer need?
• What beliefs are you holding onto that are no longer true for you?

In moments that you feel constricted, anxious, or tired ask what you can let go of. Don’t be afraid of the answer. Though it may be uncomfortable because it introduces an element of the unknown, following these insights will always lead to freedom and liberation.

Your computer can only handle so much data, and the same is true of you.

If you don’t delete old emails and files and continue to add new programs without uninstalling old ones, you’ll find that it becomes sluggish and unresponsive. Just as freeing up space allows your computer to process things more quickly, so too will clearing your own personal space (whether of things or thoughts) allow you to access new levels of clarity and creativity.

Space brings freedom.

You’ll breathe easier, be more present in every action and interaction you partake of and bring more of who you really are to what you do. And you’ll open the space of possibility that allows something to come in that may surprise and delight you.

Any work you do on yourself will serve as a form of leadership for others who, like you, seek their own answers and could benefit from your example of unearthing what is possible and allowing it to take form in new and unexpected ways.

Discerning what is and isn’t working and up leveling your game becomes easier and more fun when you have support. When you are ready to go deeper, check out UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Don’t let them stop you

 

Ever have a conversation that stopped you in your tracks? This video is about one of those pivotal moments that took the wind out of my sails for a while – until I realized I could generate the energy I needed from a different source. Maybe you can relate…

For more on overcoming life’s potential showstoppers, visit UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

Diane

My Cringe Worthy Epiphany

 

I almost didn’t post this video. It was filmed back in June – and I initially cringed when I reviewed it. But in the spirit of learning and growth, I decided to share it anyway…

I was in the middle of creating my series on learning to break habits that are hurting you.  And I had this experience that made me realize how we get stuck in habits that work against us in the first place.

It’s kind of embarrassing. But you know what? That’s life.

Often, it’s those awkward, even humiliating moments that provide us with insight, wisdom, or at the very least a little levity.

Maybe you will relate…

To your success!

Diane

 

How to Ease Post Vacation Re-entry

 

No matter how much you love your work, returning from vacation can be difficult.

The barrage of emails, phone messages and projects that often pile up can feel heavy, burdensome and downright overwhelming. You may feel soft and ill equipped to address them. After all, it took a while to settle those engines down. And there is only so much even the boldest of coffee can do for you.

But vacation re-entry doesn’t have to be a stress filled experience. 

In fact, when you approach returning from vacation consciously and intentionally, you can make the most of the relaxation you enjoyed in much the same way that you maximize any investment.   That precious down time you allowed yourself can put you ahead of the curve rather than behind it.

This week and next, I’ll be exploring strategies for doing just that. Let’s start with the first…

(1) Get clear on what you most want.

 The beauty of a vacation is that it allows you to get some distance from the myriad of little things that keep you from seeing the bigger picture in your life. You can reconnect with what’s most important to you ­­– and get clarity on what you want more of and less of.

It often happens on more of a feeling level than a thinking level. You may find yourself buoyed by possibility, even if you aren’t sure exactly what it is.  Time away ushers in new energy that allows us to feel life could be so much simpler, richer, satisfying and fulfilling.

Don’t let that feeling disappear just because your vacation has come to an end. Before you jump back into your work, tune into the bigger picture of what you want to experience and see if you can feel it as though it already exists.

Do you want more simplicity? To cut through complexity with confidence and ease? To infuse your work with more optimism and lightness?

How do you want to feel at the end of the day? See if you can go there and experience it now. Imagine yourself driving home feeling grateful for what you accomplished and enthusiastic about what is on the horizon. Then return to the moment and approach your day from that frame of mind.

Tuning into the mindset that will keep you in sync with your vision will guide your actions in ways that are most likely to bring your desired state to fruition. So, lock it in, and commit to staying aligned and returning to that conscious state of mind if and when something momentarily steals your focus.

If you want to learn to infuse your work year-round with the same freshness and inspiration you feel after a good vacation, message me to learn about a new program I’ll soon be making available to a limited number of executives.

Next week, I’ll post about the second strategy for coming back strong after your vacation: Take advantage of the opportunity to see things with a fresh perspective.

But what if you could?

 

Do you remember what it was like to be unconstrained by the world’s limitations?

Maybe you were a young child, wanting to fly to the moon or discover buried treasure. How long was it before the people around you compelled you to be more “practical and realistic”?

They didn’t mean any harm.  In fact, those people likely had your best interests in mind.  They wanted to help you learn the rules for engagement in a world of challenges and limitations – to keep you from experiencing pain and disappointment.

Chances are you do that for your own young children.  I know I did.

But over time, the rules for engagement can become more constraining than they are empowering.  Especially when those rules don’t really apply the way they used to.

Have you noticed that many of the old, ingrained ways of getting things done and achieving success are no longer effective, or even relevant?

We are all experiencing it – on both an individual and a collective level, in our homes, our communities and our organizations.  And we need to find a better way of dealing with these emerging challenges and opportunities.  To do that, we must transcend old, well-worn, even tried and true methods that just aren’t working anymore.

The time has come for us to access the creativity, ingenuity, curiosity, and wonder of that little kid that knew no limits and had the willingness and determination to blaze a new trail.

As trees and flowers all around us burst into bloom with the emergence of spring, we can allow creative energy and inspiration to move through us as well.

In nature and in our own lives, the old must give way to the new. Trees lose their leaves and flowers and plants that have been pruned proliferate with an energy and vitality that wouldn’t have otherwise been possible.

What old beliefs and assumptions in your life and leadership need to give way to what is blooming within you?

The next time your great idea or inspiration is met with inner skepticism or restraint, notice what you are believing and ask yourself if it’s really true. Stay with it and see if you can find a way around the things that would otherwise stop you in your tracks.

We are all the pioneers and architects of our own lives and now is the time to go beyond what we previously thought was possible and do the things we’ve been capable of all along.

“Nothing else in the world…not all the armies…is so powerful as an idea whose time has come.”- Victor Hugo,

Here’s to your success!

 

It’s NOT business as usual…

 

Great organizations are not created accidentally. They are a product of conscious intention and deliberate action shared by leaders at all levels, regardless of formal title or level of responsibility.

So often people feel they’re at the mercy of their circumstances at work – the one arena they spend more of their time in than any other. It’s not uncommon for people to feel lost, misunderstood, overlooked or undervalued.

Work can feel like a never-ending series of boxes that need to be checked and a perpetual exercise in firefighting. Competition, office politics and inflated egos can shut people down, take the wind out of their sails, and lead them to feel powerless and unimportant.

But in great organizations these things are not the unavoidable byproduct of “business as usual”. Dynamics that keep people feeling trapped in auto-pilot, stunt their growth, and ultimately breed toxic cultures are carefully monitored and proactively addressed.

There is a spirit of solidarity and shared leadership that unites people in the face of challenges that would otherwise tear organizations apart.

A client I had the privilege to work onsite with a couple of weeks ago is a perfect example.

They are the kind of organization that makes you feel good the moment you come into their presence. The energy they share is dynamic and alive. People go out of their way to care for each other and are invested in each other’s and the organization’s success.  They have one of the lowest turnover rates in the industry and they attract the best and the brightest.

Their CEO came to me over seven years ago, expressing his desire to create a vibrant culture of inspired leadership.

It’s not uncommon for executives to bring programs in-house for their people to attend. But the most exemplary organizations begin those initiatives at the highest levels.

This wasn’t an initiative that would be arbitrarily rolled out. Instead, the C-level team insisted on experiencing the Pinocchio Principle Unleashed program starting with themselves – going through it together.

They knew that to create the kind of culture that would become infused into every level of the organization, they had to become living models of what they themselves were learning and hoped to see develop in their people.

In the years that followed, they’ve continued to enroll small groups of their people through the same program and taken deliberate steps to ensure the learning is reinforced and integrated into daily conversations and ways of doing business.

By practicing real leadership from the top down, they’ve nurtured it from the bottom up as well.

Working with clients like these to achieve unprecedented results by igniting the power of their people is one of the things I love most about my work. Message me if you are interested in creating a vibrant and inspired culture in your organization.

Lighthouses and Leaders: How to Live Better and Lead Brighter

 

I’ve always been drawn to lighthouses.  And this summer we traveled to visit one of my favorites…

But this trip was unlike previous visits – and it led me to some powerful insights about what lighthouses and leaders have in common.

We look to leaders to light the way.  But sometimes even the mightiest lights begin to dim.  What do you do when that happens?

This week’s video will give you some powerful tips on how you can live better and lead brighter.

You likely have a few of your own practices for refreshing and reviving yourself… I’d love to hear them!  Leave a comment here so others can benefit as well.

Here’s to reigniting your light!

Diane

FULL TRANSCRIPT:

Hi, Diane Bolden, executive coach and author of the “Pinocchio Principle: Becoming a Real Leader – How to Unleash Genius in Yourself and Those You Lead.” And I just wanted to tell you a quick story of something that happened over our summer vacation.

We went up to Northern California and one of our favorite places to visit up there is the Point Reyes Lighthouse. It was built in 1870 and back in its heyday, its light was so bright that it could be seen all the way to the horizon for 24 miles. The path to get there is beautiful. It takes a little while to get to the viewing point but once you do, it’s well worth the trip… …except for the time we were there.

It was so foggy you could barely even make out the lighthouse. I almost didn’t even snap a picture of it. But when I got home, I was really glad I did. Because I was reflecting on the whole nature of lighthouses and I realized that the fog doesn’t really matter.

The whole purpose of a lighthouse is to cut through the fog, to show a path for other people. And the lighthouse doesn’t change the fog… doesn’t take it away. It just shines its light so that other people can find their way. And I think that’s exactly what a leader does.

Regardless of your title, your vocation or your role, you have the ability to show other people a way through the thickest of challenges and to help yourself find your way too. But every once in a while, our lights as leaders start to flicker and dim and it’s really important when that happens that we tend to the light so that we can continue to help other people.

In fact, if your light’s starting to dim, one of the most generous things you can do as a leader is reignite it and do whatever you can to lead brighter. And maybe that just means slowing down long enough to catch your breath or connect the dots or reflect a little on what life’s trying to teach you. Maybe it’s about getting connected with what’s most important to you, what it is that you want, and how you can create more of that.

Maybe it’s about making the decision to recognize and release habits that are no longer serving you or just doing some things that bring you joy. Spending time with people that make you smile and laugh or doing whatever it is that lights you up. Maybe it’s taking a walk in nature or gardening or writing or listening to some great music or playing music.

I don’t know what it is for you, but you probably do. And if your light’s starting to dim a little, chances are you probably haven’t let yourself do it for a while. Regardless of how bright your light is, regularly tending to it will allow you to cut through the deepest of fog so that you can help other people find their path too.

Do you know somebody whose light could use a little brightening? Share this video with them and a little of your own light. And don’t forget to take good care of yourself – so that you too can live and lead brighter.

Is this you?

 

High achieving executives, particularly those with a heart for service and contribution, are prone to a very common pitfall…

And it keeps them from doing some of the very things they most pride themselves on.

Take a look at this short video and see if you can relate.

If it strikes a chord and you’d like some assistance avoiding (or recovering from) a similar fate, consider joining me next Friday, September 20 for the kickoff of The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed Fast Track. You’ll have lifetime access to seven modules of practical tips, tools and approaches to help you overcome stress, pressure and overwhelm and lead from a Genius mindset.

And each Friday for the next seven weeks we’ll meet via Zoom for additional training, support and live coaching.

Here’s what one participant had to say about her experience in the Pinocchio Principle Unleashed program:

Diane helped me uncover the thoughts I didn’t realize Iwas having and the things I was holding onto that were getting in the way – answering the question for me about why I couldn’t execute. I was able to let go of a lot of self-blame and really be in the present moment, deliberate about how I want to show up. I feel more intentional and more empowered in my work and my life. And I’m committed to being more thoughtful about creating my schedule and not allowing things to overwhelm me.

 Your greatest gift that you‘ll get if you’ll invest this time is that you’ll reconnect with yourself and find the answers you need – open up your mind and your heart, which is something you can’t do when you’re going a 100 miles an hour. The whole experience was very authentic. Diane is truly invested and engaged in creating something better for the people she works with.

       – Connie Phillips- President and CEO, Lutheran Social Services of the Southwest

Get more information and save your seat at UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.