My Cringe Worthy Epiphany

 

I almost didn’t post this video. It was filmed back in June – and I initially cringed when I reviewed it. But in the spirit of learning and growth, I decided to share it anyway…

I was in the middle of creating my series on learning to break habits that are hurting you.  And I had this experience that made me realize how we get stuck in habits that work against us in the first place.

It’s kind of embarrassing. But you know what? That’s life.

Often, it’s those awkward, even humiliating moments that provide us with insight, wisdom, or at the very least a little levity.

Maybe you will relate…

To your success!

Diane

 

How to Ease Post Vacation Re-entry

 

No matter how much you love your work, returning from vacation can be difficult.

The barrage of emails, phone messages and projects that often pile up can feel heavy, burdensome and downright overwhelming. You may feel soft and ill equipped to address them. After all, it took a while to settle those engines down. And there is only so much even the boldest of coffee can do for you.

But vacation re-entry doesn’t have to be a stress filled experience. 

In fact, when you approach returning from vacation consciously and intentionally, you can make the most of the relaxation you enjoyed in much the same way that you maximize any investment.   That precious down time you allowed yourself can put you ahead of the curve rather than behind it.

This week and next, I’ll be exploring strategies for doing just that. Let’s start with the first…

(1) Get clear on what you most want.

 The beauty of a vacation is that it allows you to get some distance from the myriad of little things that keep you from seeing the bigger picture in your life. You can reconnect with what’s most important to you ­­– and get clarity on what you want more of and less of.

It often happens on more of a feeling level than a thinking level. You may find yourself buoyed by possibility, even if you aren’t sure exactly what it is.  Time away ushers in new energy that allows us to feel life could be so much simpler, richer, satisfying and fulfilling.

Don’t let that feeling disappear just because your vacation has come to an end. Before you jump back into your work, tune into the bigger picture of what you want to experience and see if you can feel it as though it already exists.

Do you want more simplicity? To cut through complexity with confidence and ease? To infuse your work with more optimism and lightness?

How do you want to feel at the end of the day? See if you can go there and experience it now. Imagine yourself driving home feeling grateful for what you accomplished and enthusiastic about what is on the horizon. Then return to the moment and approach your day from that frame of mind.

Tuning into the mindset that will keep you in sync with your vision will guide your actions in ways that are most likely to bring your desired state to fruition. So, lock it in, and commit to staying aligned and returning to that conscious state of mind if and when something momentarily steals your focus.

If you want to learn to infuse your work year-round with the same freshness and inspiration you feel after a good vacation, message me to learn about a new program I’ll soon be making available to a limited number of executives.

Next week, I’ll post about the second strategy for coming back strong after your vacation: Take advantage of the opportunity to see things with a fresh perspective.

But what if you could?

 

Do you remember what it was like to be unconstrained by the world’s limitations?

Maybe you were a young child, wanting to fly to the moon or discover buried treasure. How long was it before the people around you compelled you to be more “practical and realistic”?

They didn’t mean any harm.  In fact, those people likely had your best interests in mind.  They wanted to help you learn the rules for engagement in a world of challenges and limitations – to keep you from experiencing pain and disappointment.

Chances are you do that for your own young children.  I know I did.

But over time, the rules for engagement can become more constraining than they are empowering.  Especially when those rules don’t really apply the way they used to.

Have you noticed that many of the old, ingrained ways of getting things done and achieving success are no longer effective, or even relevant?

We are all experiencing it – on both an individual and a collective level, in our homes, our communities and our organizations.  And we need to find a better way of dealing with these emerging challenges and opportunities.  To do that, we must transcend old, well-worn, even tried and true methods that just aren’t working anymore.

The time has come for us to access the creativity, ingenuity, curiosity, and wonder of that little kid that knew no limits and had the willingness and determination to blaze a new trail.

As trees and flowers all around us burst into bloom with the emergence of spring, we can allow creative energy and inspiration to move through us as well.

In nature and in our own lives, the old must give way to the new. Trees lose their leaves and flowers and plants that have been pruned proliferate with an energy and vitality that wouldn’t have otherwise been possible.

What old beliefs and assumptions in your life and leadership need to give way to what is blooming within you?

The next time your great idea or inspiration is met with inner skepticism or restraint, notice what you are believing and ask yourself if it’s really true. Stay with it and see if you can find a way around the things that would otherwise stop you in your tracks.

We are all the pioneers and architects of our own lives and now is the time to go beyond what we previously thought was possible and do the things we’ve been capable of all along.

“Nothing else in the world…not all the armies…is so powerful as an idea whose time has come.”- Victor Hugo,

Here’s to your success!

 

It’s NOT business as usual…

 

Great organizations are not created accidentally. They are a product of conscious intention and deliberate action shared by leaders at all levels, regardless of formal title or level of responsibility.

So often people feel they’re at the mercy of their circumstances at work – the one arena they spend more of their time in than any other. It’s not uncommon for people to feel lost, misunderstood, overlooked or undervalued.

Work can feel like a never-ending series of boxes that need to be checked and a perpetual exercise in firefighting. Competition, office politics and inflated egos can shut people down, take the wind out of their sails, and lead them to feel powerless and unimportant.

But in great organizations these things are not the unavoidable byproduct of “business as usual”. Dynamics that keep people feeling trapped in auto-pilot, stunt their growth, and ultimately breed toxic cultures are carefully monitored and proactively addressed.

There is a spirit of solidarity and shared leadership that unites people in the face of challenges that would otherwise tear organizations apart.

A client I had the privilege to work onsite with a couple of weeks ago is a perfect example.

They are the kind of organization that makes you feel good the moment you come into their presence. The energy they share is dynamic and alive. People go out of their way to care for each other and are invested in each other’s and the organization’s success.  They have one of the lowest turnover rates in the industry and they attract the best and the brightest.

Their CEO came to me over seven years ago, expressing his desire to create a vibrant culture of inspired leadership.

It’s not uncommon for executives to bring programs in-house for their people to attend. But the most exemplary organizations begin those initiatives at the highest levels.

This wasn’t an initiative that would be arbitrarily rolled out. Instead, the C-level team insisted on experiencing the Pinocchio Principle Unleashed program starting with themselves – going through it together.

They knew that to create the kind of culture that would become infused into every level of the organization, they had to become living models of what they themselves were learning and hoped to see develop in their people.

In the years that followed, they’ve continued to enroll small groups of their people through the same program and taken deliberate steps to ensure the learning is reinforced and integrated into daily conversations and ways of doing business.

By practicing real leadership from the top down, they’ve nurtured it from the bottom up as well.

Working with clients like these to achieve unprecedented results by igniting the power of their people is one of the things I love most about my work. Message me if you are interested in creating a vibrant and inspired culture in your organization.

Lighthouses and Leaders: How to Live Better and Lead Brighter

 

I’ve always been drawn to lighthouses.  And this summer we traveled to visit one of my favorites…

But this trip was unlike previous visits – and it led me to some powerful insights about what lighthouses and leaders have in common.

We look to leaders to light the way.  But sometimes even the mightiest lights begin to dim.  What do you do when that happens?

This week’s video will give you some powerful tips on how you can live better and lead brighter.

You likely have a few of your own practices for refreshing and reviving yourself… I’d love to hear them!  Leave a comment here so others can benefit as well.

Here’s to reigniting your light!

Diane

FULL TRANSCRIPT:

Hi, Diane Bolden, executive coach and author of the “Pinocchio Principle: Becoming a Real Leader – How to Unleash Genius in Yourself and Those You Lead.” And I just wanted to tell you a quick story of something that happened over our summer vacation.

We went up to Northern California and one of our favorite places to visit up there is the Point Reyes Lighthouse. It was built in 1870 and back in its heyday, its light was so bright that it could be seen all the way to the horizon for 24 miles. The path to get there is beautiful. It takes a little while to get to the viewing point but once you do, it’s well worth the trip… …except for the time we were there.

It was so foggy you could barely even make out the lighthouse. I almost didn’t even snap a picture of it. But when I got home, I was really glad I did. Because I was reflecting on the whole nature of lighthouses and I realized that the fog doesn’t really matter.

The whole purpose of a lighthouse is to cut through the fog, to show a path for other people. And the lighthouse doesn’t change the fog… doesn’t take it away. It just shines its light so that other people can find their way. And I think that’s exactly what a leader does.

Regardless of your title, your vocation or your role, you have the ability to show other people a way through the thickest of challenges and to help yourself find your way too. But every once in a while, our lights as leaders start to flicker and dim and it’s really important when that happens that we tend to the light so that we can continue to help other people.

In fact, if your light’s starting to dim, one of the most generous things you can do as a leader is reignite it and do whatever you can to lead brighter. And maybe that just means slowing down long enough to catch your breath or connect the dots or reflect a little on what life’s trying to teach you. Maybe it’s about getting connected with what’s most important to you, what it is that you want, and how you can create more of that.

Maybe it’s about making the decision to recognize and release habits that are no longer serving you or just doing some things that bring you joy. Spending time with people that make you smile and laugh or doing whatever it is that lights you up. Maybe it’s taking a walk in nature or gardening or writing or listening to some great music or playing music.

I don’t know what it is for you, but you probably do. And if your light’s starting to dim a little, chances are you probably haven’t let yourself do it for a while. Regardless of how bright your light is, regularly tending to it will allow you to cut through the deepest of fog so that you can help other people find their path too.

Do you know somebody whose light could use a little brightening? Share this video with them and a little of your own light. And don’t forget to take good care of yourself – so that you too can live and lead brighter.

Is this you?

 

High achieving executives, particularly those with a heart for service and contribution, are prone to a very common pitfall…

And it keeps them from doing some of the very things they most pride themselves on.

Take a look at this short video and see if you can relate.

If it strikes a chord and you’d like some assistance avoiding (or recovering from) a similar fate, consider joining me next Friday, September 20 for the kickoff of The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed Fast Track. You’ll have lifetime access to seven modules of practical tips, tools and approaches to help you overcome stress, pressure and overwhelm and lead from a Genius mindset.

And each Friday for the next seven weeks we’ll meet via Zoom for additional training, support and live coaching.

Here’s what one participant had to say about her experience in the Pinocchio Principle Unleashed program:

Diane helped me uncover the thoughts I didn’t realize Iwas having and the things I was holding onto that were getting in the way – answering the question for me about why I couldn’t execute. I was able to let go of a lot of self-blame and really be in the present moment, deliberate about how I want to show up. I feel more intentional and more empowered in my work and my life. And I’m committed to being more thoughtful about creating my schedule and not allowing things to overwhelm me.

 Your greatest gift that you‘ll get if you’ll invest this time is that you’ll reconnect with yourself and find the answers you need – open up your mind and your heart, which is something you can’t do when you’re going a 100 miles an hour. The whole experience was very authentic. Diane is truly invested and engaged in creating something better for the people she works with.

       – Connie Phillips- President and CEO, Lutheran Social Services of the Southwest

Get more information and save your seat at UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Master Your Mindset and Achieve Your Grandest Visions

 

Imagine that you’ve stepped into your car, turned the key, and shifted into drive. You’ve got your destination in mind, have charted a course to get there and are eager to be on your way. But when you step on the gas, your car only goes a fraction of the speed you were anticipating. Frustrated, you push harder. Your engine revs, but the car doesn’t go any faster.

And then you realize you forgot to take off the parking brake.

Trying to achieve your desired state without getting into the right mindset is a lot like driving with the parking brake on. No matter how grand your vision or bulletproof your plan, it’ll impede your progress and lead to frustration.

What is mindset and why is it important to achieving a desired state?

Mindset is simply the established set of attitudes you hold toward any given thing. It’s a product of what you are believing about yourself and others, what you (or they) are capable of, and what is or isn’t possible, among other things.

Your mindset is important because it determines what you see and consider to be real. And it determines how you’ll behave as a result.

Studies show that our brains process a small percentage of the data we take in.

To make sense of what is happening around us, we focus on what we believe to be true and screen everything else out. So, if you have a belief that something isn’t possible, you’ll give far greater attention and weight to data that suggests it cannot be done than you’ll give to information, encouragement or even proof that suggests it can.

And what you will experience is a self-fulfilling prophecy of sorts. As Henry Ford once said, “Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right.”

So, it’s important to be aware of what you’re believing about the things you endeavor to create, achieve, or become – as well as what you’re believing about yourself and your ability to succeed.

Often our doubts and misgivings are the product of messages we’ve internalized without ever really examining them. When you become aware of a limiting belief and the impact it’s having on what you most want, it begins to lose its power.

And often, when you take the time to examine those beliefs you’ll realize they just aren’t true.

With practice, you can interrupt old, worn-out thoughts that aren’t aligned with your desired outcome or behavior and substitute them for new thoughts that are.

And ultimately, you’ll learn to shift over to a new way of thinking, which will propel you into a new way of acting — one that will help you get where you most want to go.

 If you’d like some support mastering your mindset, consider joining me for my 7 week leadership development program kicking off on September 20. The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed Fast Track will allow you to break out of limiting habits and patterns and lead from a genius mindset.

It’s a compilation of approaches, techniques and tools that my most successful executive coaching clients have utilized over the years. You’ll learn to rise above stress and pressure and take your performance to the next level while enjoying your life more both on and off the job.

Reserve your seat at UnleashtheExtraordinary.com. Enroll with a friend or send a group of people from your organization and save $500 per person.

Here’s to your success!

Diane

P.S. Have you already been through the Pinocchio Principle Unleashed program? Alumni are eligible to re-enroll at a special rate of 80% off registration. And if you register with a guest, they’ll get $500 off the cost of their enrollment.

Email  Support@DianeBolden.com for group or alumni enrollment.

What if the setback is actually the springboard?

I used to believe things happened in a linear way – first this, then that; one building block upon another in a specific order; cause and effect.

I’ve since realized that achieving a larger vision or desire often triggers a chain of seemingly disjointed events that is in reality very connected.

It’s like watching a movie of a glass shattering in reverse motion. The pieces come from all directions, seemingly unrelated, to assemble into a perfect whole.

Each piece is absolutely necessary, in and of itself incomplete and incomprehensibly connected to a bigger picture.

There are often ups and downs and unanticipated occurrences.  And these seemingly divergent paths are absolutely necessary for us to experience the totality of our vision.

Sometimes we’re faced with trials that prepare us as leaders to help others work their way through those challenges – or to learn something we’ll need to know to flourish in our future endeavors.

We may not realize the significance or relevance of these experiences until much later, when in retrospect we become aware of the distinct reason we needed to endure any given challenge, setback, delay, or what originally felt like an irrelevant nuisance.

These obstacles give us a greater perspective on who we are, a larger appreciation for where we’ve been and where we’re going, and compassion for others who experience the same things we have along the way.

In dealing with these challenges, we realize that we’re far greater than we thought we were. And as leaders, we can help others appreciate and leverage their own chaos as well.

Taking the time to connect the dots of your experiences (even the disappointing or frustrating ones) can lead to some powerful insights about what life may be preparing you for.

It can also generate the resilience and regeneration necessary to work through those obstacles with greater ease and grace.

What’s irritating you right now?

Perhaps the experience you’d rather put behind you contains the very thing you need to get where you ultimately want to go.

The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed Fast Track program kicking off on September 20 can help you make the most of anything life throws at you – not only for yourself but also in service to others. Here’s what Karen Kurtz of Dolese had to say about it:

“What I liked most about The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed Program was that it gave me “permission” to take time out of my day to think about leadership, productivity, habits, etc. and really dig inside and reflect on obstacles that were preventing me from moving forward and the tools I could use to overcome them. The program goes beyond simple leadership principles and jargon and really helps you look inward into what you want and what you want to be. I would recommend it to anyone who needs to sharpen their tool belt and reconnect with their true leadership style.”

For more information or to save your spot, go to UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

Diane

P.S. Attend with a friend or colleague and you’ll both save $500 on the cost of registration.

Do you work for an organization that has a budget for leadership development? Download the business case for completing the program, which spells out seven powerful ways your organization will experience a return on its investment

Do You Dare to Dream?

As children, most of us received mixed messages. You may have been encouraged to follow your heart and give life to your dreams in addition to being conditioned to be practical, hedge your bets, and take the safest route.

Over time, many of us have allowed the roar of public opinion – that often tells us our dreams are frivolous, selfish, and unlikely to come to fruition – to silence that small still voice within.

But those among us who have risen against their odds have learned to reverse that process and believe in themselves and their dreams despite the overwhelming evidence around them that would suggest that success is improbable.

“If you lose hope, somehow you lose the vitality that keeps life moving, you lost that courage to be, that quality that helps you go on in spite of it all.

And so today I still have a dream.”

~ Martin Luther King

Listen closely to the silent whispers of your heart that beckon you to think bigger and act bolder – and to bust out of old paradigms that feel stale or stagnant.

Do what you can to gain clarity on what they are telling you.

And then take action.

If you’d like some help turning your vision into reality, check out the replay of my recent Navigating Transitions: From Crossroads to Clarity workshop.

Here’s to your success!

Diane

P.S. Not sure what the workshop covered? This link will also take you to an overview of the main points explored in this 52-minute replay video.

Harness the Power of Your Heart’s Desire

 

Consider the essence of what you most want to achieve, create, or become.  Perhaps it is not yet concrete, but rather an inkling of something that is calling to you.

Every great accomplishment begins with a dream and a vision.  It requires imagination and an openness to receive its gifts.  As Albert Einstein once told us, “Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life’s coming attractions.”

And imagination is big and amorphous – it’s not easily captured, quantified, or broken down.  It is something that must be welcomed and nurtured.  The reward of having done so is that it will reveal itself to you in ways that make you feel alive with possibility.

We are often encouraged to set goals before we even have a vision of what we want to accomplish. But doing so deprives us of the dream that provides the fuel necessary to achieve those goals.

There is wisdom in your desire – even if you cannot yet quantify it, break it down in tangible ways, or even articulate it. In fact, sheer inklings and aspirations can become powerful seeds for the most innovative and ground-breaking accomplishments.

What is your vision? And how can you breathe life into it?

If you’d like more on how to gain the clarity necessary to envision and chart a path to your desired future, download my special report, “Why Real Leaders Don’t Set Goals (and what they do instead)”.