How to Connect, Communicate & Collaborate with Greater Influence & Impact

 

Are there people in your office (or your life) that drive you nuts because they insist on doing things so differently than you do?

We’re led to believe we should treat others the way we want to be treated.  But if one person’s preferences are another’s irritations, using that approach to connect, communicate and collaborate doesn’t always work very well…

When people don’t say and do things the way you’d like them to, you might believe they are intentionally trying to make you crazy – when in reality they are just operating with a style that is different than yours.

This week’s video will give you a leg up on understanding people’s differing styles in a way that’ll transform frustration into appreciation, collaboration and synergy.

And if you’d like to find out what is likely YOUR most dominant behavioral style, take this complimentary 14-question quiz.  Along with your results, I’ll provide you with tips to help you not only understand but also LEVERAGE your unique style to maximize your effectiveness, influence and impact – with others who are both similar to and different from you.

Here’s to your success!

Diane

P.S.  If you know of others who might like to learn about their style  – and how to best connect, communicate and collaborate with others too, you can direct them to www.LearnYourStyle.com to take the complimentary quiz as well.

Overcome Your Limiting Beliefs and Create Your Desired Future

 

It’s pretty indisputable… to create and experience your desired future, you must overcome your limiting beliefs.

Eleanor Roosevelt once said, “The future depends on those who believe in the beauty of their dreams”.  And according to Mahatma Gandhi, “The future depends on what we do in the present.”

I think they are both right.

The thing is, most of us are so busy running around fighting fires that we don’t give a whole lot of thought to what we’d like to create.  And even when we do, those dreams and visions are sometimes accompanied by hesitation, doubt, and even resistance.

The good news is that when your most formidable obstacles are self-generated, you most certainly have the power to rise above them.

In this week’s video, I’ll share some tips on how you can overcome your limiting beliefs that might otherwise stop you in your tracks (or keep you from starting at all) – so that you can move confidently toward the future you most want to experience.

Here’s to the beauty of YOUR dream!

Diane

P.S. The content of this week’s video was drawn from a workshop for visionary and heart centered leaders I recently presented at a Board Retreat for a client.  If you’re interested in bringing a workshop or webinar into your organization, contact us at support@DianeBolden.com.

 FULL TRANSCRIPT:

Hi, Diane Bolden, executive coach and author of The Pinocchio Principle: Becoming a Real Leader – How to Unleash Genius in Yourself and Those You Lead.

A couple weeks ago, I facilitated a workshop for heart-centered and visionary leaders at a retreat for one of my clients. Retreats are such a great way to get a bigger perspective and to begin to connect the dots of where you’re at, where it is you most want to go, what you’re learning along the way, what’s beckoning to you.

But you know what? You don’t have to get away or go someplace fancy in order to have a retreat. You can start by doing that right here, right now.

And it is something that you have to make a conscious decision to do because often, we’re so busy running around, fighting fires, dealing with the crisis of the day that we don’t stop to think about what is it we most want and what we might need to do in order to get it.

Sometimes when you think about what it is that you want, you might experience a feeling of resistance or dread or heaviness – and that’s to be expected because anytime you endeavor to do something that goes beyond your comfort zone and requires that you do something that you haven’t done before, you’re going to be met with resistance.

Oftentimes though, the resistance that we feel is something that we associate with the task and our chances of actually being able to accomplish it, when, in reality, those feelings are really just a product of what we’re thinking about the vision that we’re entertaining in our minds. And that thinking, when you’re not aware of it, tends to run the show…

Thinking that goes something like this, ” I don’t have the time to do that.” When you’re not aware of that limiting belief, you’ll end up acting in ways that make it true because you won’t take the time or make the time.

You might believe something like, ” I’m not really sure I’m cut out to do that,” or, “I don’t know what it is I would need to know” in order to pull that off,” or, “I would have to have everything all figured out, and I am nowhere near being able to do that.” When you believe those things, again, they stop you before you’ll ever even start because if you believe that you don’t have the ability to pull something off, why would you even bother trying?

You might believe something like, “I’m not really sure I can get people to support me.” And again, with that belief, you’re likely not to even ask because you feel like you already know what the answer will be.

The thing is, when you become conscious of what the limiting beliefs are that create that heaviness and tend to stop you in your tracks, you can begin to challenge them. Once you’re aware of limiting beliefs, they tend to lose their power over you.  Awareness opens the door that allows you to overcome your limiting beliefs.  Once you’re aware of a thought that isn’t serving you (and perhaps isn’t even true), you can replace it with something better.

If you think about a belief like, “I don’t really have the time to do that,” you might recognize, “You know what? I may not have the time to do all of it right away, but I do have the time to take a couple steps here and there – and I can make the time to do it regularly enough that I’ll actually make good progress.”

Something like, “I’m not sure I have what it takes in order to figure that out,” or even, “I need to have it all figured out before I can even start,” when you challenge it, can be shifted into a belief that actually supports you – a belief that says, “I don’t have to have everything all figured out. I just need to figure out the first few steps, and from that vantage point, I’ll know what I need to do next.”

A belief like, “I’m not really sure I could get people to support me” could become something more like, “I’m willing to approach a few people to see what it would take in order to get the support that I would need.”

In a few short months, we’ll be in a whole new year. It’s a great time to begin to take stock of what it is that’s beckoning to you and to create the space you need to incubate those kinds of visions, so that they are more likely to become reality. It’s also a great time to let go of anything that could get in the way of allowing you to achieve those visions and dreams.

The best time for you to recognize and overcome your limiting beliefs is now.

So, take some time to see if you can connect with what it is that you most want to create in the coming months and year, and what it is that you’re believing about that particular vision or dream that could potentially stop you. When you become aware of what those showstoppers are, they lose their power over you. And you can change them into something that actually can facilitate and increase the chances that you’ll meet with the success you desire.

If you’re interested in bringing a workshop or a webinar into your organization, contact us at support@dianebolden.com. Thanks for watching, and here’s to your success.

Four Questions to Supercharge Your Success This Season

 

Did you know that this is officially the first full week of fall? Every time of the year brings gifts that you can leverage to improve your work and your life.  Four simple questions covered below can help you supercharge your success this season…

Fall marks the transition between the bright and dark halves of the year – and it brings with it opportunities that are easy to overlook in the hustle and bustle of our daily lives.

This week’s video will help you make the most of this auspicious time in a way that’ll help you get where you want to go in the coming months (and year ahead).

For more on how let go of the old to make room for the new, check out How to Soften the Pain of Growth.

Here’s to fall… and to leveraging its gifts to not only finish the year strong, but to setting yourself up for continued success in 2024 and beyond!

FULL TRANSCRIPT:

Hi, Diane Bolden, Executive Coach and Author of “The Pinocchio Principle: Becoming a Real Leader How to Unleash Genius in Yourself and Those You Lead.”

Can you believe it’s fall?

I don’t know about you, but I don’t know where the summer went. It seems like time is such a blur.

That’s why I love the changing seasons because they kind of jar us awake and you can’t help but notice because you can see it and you can feel it. The days get shorter, and the nights are longer. The temperature drops. The leaves start to change colors and fall from the trees, and even the air smells different.

It’s a time of letting go and preparing for regeneration. Animals start to hibernate. The leaves fall from the trees – but also, did you know, that the energy of plants actually moves from creating and growing new leaves and flowers to developing a really strong root system that’ll help it make it through the winter?

Fall perennials that are planted grow really strong roots so that in the spring they can burst forward with vigorous growth and a profusion of flowers.

And we can take our cues from nature also… slowing down long enough to just catch up with ourselves and connect the dots.

I don’t necessarily think we need to hibernate, but just being able to kind of reflect on where you’ve been, where you’re going, what’s most important to you, and how you can take good care of yourself is so important.

Here are four questions that can help you supercharge your success this season.

1) What is it that you’ve already accomplished over the year so far that you’re proud of, that you can celebrate? And what is it that’s calling to you in the future? What’s most important to you? What is it that you really want to focus your time and energy on?

2) What are two or three things you’ve learned this year? Maybe it’s a skill that you’ve picked up, maybe it’s an insight as to what’s been getting in your way and how you might overcome that. Maybe it’s something that you’ve learned about yourself or even life.

3) How can you take care of your own root system? What is it that you need to do in order to strengthen yourself and prepare yourself to move forward with greater boldness, and ease, and momentum, and get where it is that you really want to go in the coming months – and perhaps, even the year ahead?

4) And finally, what is it that you can let go of? What is it that perhaps has run its course, and is no longer serving you? Maybe it’s a habit or a pattern, or something that you’ve done for a really long time that just really isn’t working for you.

Letting go of things can be hard, even when they no longer serve us because they’re comfortable and they’re familiar. I actually wrote an article about that a few years ago, which I’ll put a link to below. It’s called “How to Soften the Pain of Growth.”

But in the meantime, here’s to fall – to all the things that you’ve accomplished and have yet to accomplish; to taking the time to tend to your own root system; and to honoring the passage of seasons within your own work, and your life to supercharge your success this season!

Thanks for watching.

Lighthouses and Leaders: How to Live Better and Lead Brighter

 

I’ve always been drawn to lighthouses.  And this summer we traveled to visit one of my favorites…

But this trip was unlike previous visits – and it led me to some powerful insights about what lighthouses and leaders have in common.

We look to leaders to light the way.  But sometimes even the mightiest lights begin to dim.  What do you do when that happens?

This week’s video will give you some powerful tips on how you can live better and lead brighter.

You likely have a few of your own practices for refreshing and reviving yourself… I’d love to hear them!  Leave a comment here so others can benefit as well.

Here’s to reigniting your light!

Diane

FULL TRANSCRIPT:

Hi, Diane Bolden, executive coach and author of the “Pinocchio Principle: Becoming a Real Leader – How to Unleash Genius in Yourself and Those You Lead.” And I just wanted to tell you a quick story of something that happened over our summer vacation.

We went up to Northern California and one of our favorite places to visit up there is the Point Reyes Lighthouse. It was built in 1870 and back in its heyday, its light was so bright that it could be seen all the way to the horizon for 24 miles. The path to get there is beautiful. It takes a little while to get to the viewing point but once you do, it’s well worth the trip… …except for the time we were there.

It was so foggy you could barely even make out the lighthouse. I almost didn’t even snap a picture of it. But when I got home, I was really glad I did. Because I was reflecting on the whole nature of lighthouses and I realized that the fog doesn’t really matter.

The whole purpose of a lighthouse is to cut through the fog, to show a path for other people. And the lighthouse doesn’t change the fog… doesn’t take it away. It just shines its light so that other people can find their way. And I think that’s exactly what a leader does.

Regardless of your title, your vocation or your role, you have the ability to show other people a way through the thickest of challenges and to help yourself find your way too. But every once in a while, our lights as leaders start to flicker and dim and it’s really important when that happens that we tend to the light so that we can continue to help other people.

In fact, if your light’s starting to dim, one of the most generous things you can do as a leader is reignite it and do whatever you can to lead brighter. And maybe that just means slowing down long enough to catch your breath or connect the dots or reflect a little on what life’s trying to teach you. Maybe it’s about getting connected with what’s most important to you, what it is that you want, and how you can create more of that.

Maybe it’s about making the decision to recognize and release habits that are no longer serving you or just doing some things that bring you joy. Spending time with people that make you smile and laugh or doing whatever it is that lights you up. Maybe it’s taking a walk in nature or gardening or writing or listening to some great music or playing music.

I don’t know what it is for you, but you probably do. And if your light’s starting to dim a little, chances are you probably haven’t let yourself do it for a while. Regardless of how bright your light is, regularly tending to it will allow you to cut through the deepest of fog so that you can help other people find their path too.

Do you know somebody whose light could use a little brightening? Share this video with them and a little of your own light. And don’t forget to take good care of yourself – so that you too can live and lead brighter.

How to Have More Good Days at Work – and at Home

 

Work.  Some days are good, and others not so much…  Just like life, right?

Since we spend so many of our waking hours working, it’s likely that a good day at work will spill over into your life after work.  Unfortunately, a not-so-good day will do that too.

You can’t always change what comes at you in your professional life, but there are some things you can do to have a better experience of it. 

What’s interesting is that improving your experience of work won’t just allow you to enjoy your life more. It can also boost your performance, leading not only to greater satisfaction and fulfillment – but also increased effectiveness and better results.

This week’s video expands on that idea and gives you a simple example of how to have more good days at work – and at home.  The audio is a snippet of some opening comments from a recent Pinocchio Principle Unleashed group session.

If you enjoy it and want more, I encourage you to check out the full program here:  The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed – The Real Leader’s Guide to Accessing the Freedom & Flow of Your Authentic Genius.  Registration for the fall session will open soon, and priority enrollment will be given to those on the waiting list.

We all have plenty of work in our lives.  Here’s to putting more life into our work – and watching both grow infinitely richer!

FULL VIDEO TRANSCRIPT

One day when my son was 8 years old, he came home from camp with a riddle. He said, “Pretend you’re in a box with four walls all around you and it’s airtight. There’s no handles and no latches.  How do you get out?”

“Hmm, I responded.  “I don’t know. I think I would punch my way out.”

He said “No.”

“Okay, then I’d use my legs. I’d kick my way out.”

“No.” He was emphatic.

I thought for a moment. “Hmm. Maybe I’d try to chew my way out.”

He was getting more and more irritated with me. “No.”

I was out of ideas, “I don’t know. I give up. How do you get out?”

“Mom,” he said.  “If you’re pretending you’re in a box with airtight walls, the way you get out is you STOP PRETENDING.”

Wow, this from an eight year old.

It’s crept into my thinking several times over the years because I think it’s such a great analogy for what we do.

How Beliefs Can Become Boxes

We have these beliefs…

Have you ever thought about how your belief about work shapes your experience of work? To a large degree, we’re pretty much conditioned to believe that work is not supposed to be fun – that work is something that you do in order to earn a living, pay your bills, feed your family, and be a responsible human being. Work is something that you do and you just get through it.

And living… well, living is what you do after work, right?

It’s part of our societal conditioning. Have you ever noticed that?

You Can Break Out of Your Box

The people who enjoy their work are people who have realized that doesn’t have to be true.

“What if I didn’t think that? What if I approached it differently? What if I thought of work as an opportunity for me to do something cool, to contribute to something bigger than me? What if I thought of work as an opportunity to be around people or to partner with people that I really enjoy, or that are really interesting to me, or that I can learn from? What if I think of work as a way that I can somehow grow?”

What a novel idea.

Work is What You Make It

What’s interesting is that people who believe work is a chore, experience it that way. And they get bogged down, and they have so much to do, and they feel like they’re never going to be able to finish it. And it’s one more thing and everything’s going wrong. And then there’s this and there’s that and they can’t wait to go home.

And that person could be working side by side with somebody who believes – even just for that day, even just for that moment, that work is something different. And they will have a whole different experience. They will tell you something entirely different.

It’s not that they won’t have a whole boatload of work to do. It’s not that they won’t have pressure or deadlines and people relying on them and more to do than there’s time to do.

But there’s something about people who believe different things about work that changes the way they interact with everybody. EVERYBODY.

Learning How to Have More Good Days at Work is About Making a Choice

If you think about the last time you went even just to get a cup of coffee… the difference between somebody taking your order that never makes eye contact with you, that’s having kind of a crappy day, that is kind of wearing it on their body and the way that you feel when they serve you…

…the difference between that and somebody who when you walk in, looks you in the eye and asks you how you’re doing and maybe shares something funny or is genuinely interested in you. And really you can tell that when they ask you how you are, it’s not just part of their script. There’s something about their presence that is with you.

I guarantee you they are having a better day than the other person… not because anything different is going on, but because they made a choice to see work differently.

Make YOUR choice.

For more, visit www.UnleashtheExtraordinary.com

Why Being Stuck on Autopilot will Keep You Locked in Overwhelm – and How to Break Out of It

 

I’ve been thinking lately about how much time we all tend to spend stuck on autopilot.  You know, that state where you’re going through the motions, checking boxes, running around doing things… but not really accomplishing all that much.

It’s a state of unconsciousness that leaves you wondering where the day went.  Sometimes you may not even remember what you ate for lunch, or how the time just got sucked away.

And when you have a lot on your plate, being stuck in autopilot also means you’ll likely end your days in frustration about how little you got accomplished.  And wake up the next day feeling like you’re already behind.

But what if there’s a way to break out of that rut and get back on a path that is not only productive, but enjoyable and satisfying as well?

This week’s video will give you some tips for consciously reclaiming your day and effectively accomplishing your most important tasks with ease and grace.

FULL TRANSCRIPT

Hi there. Diane Bolden, executive coach and author of the Pinocchio Principle: Becoming a Real Leader –How to Unleash Genius in Yourself and Those You Lead.

Have you ever gotten to the end of a day where you felt like you just didn’t do the things that you really wanted to get done? And then you wake up the next morning feeling like you’re already behind and perpetuating that same state of overwhelm, that frustration, that irritation that you had the day before.

Why autopilot is a problem

It’s really easy to get stuck in autopilot. And the problem with autopilot is whatever it is that you’re doing is going to be repeated on an ongoing basis. Checking boxes and trying to get through the day and feeling overwhelmed doesn’t necessarily bode itself well to high levels of productivity, to creativity, to ingenuity or to satisfaction and fulfillment.

But what if you could break through that? What if you could have an entirely different experience? What if you could interrupt that autopilot pattern and in its place access a zone where you’re productive or you’re enjoying the work that you’re doing or you’re able to access creativity and think outside of the box?

Well, today I want to share with you a tip that you can try to do just that.

The physical laws that contribute to autopilot and overwhelm

Autopilot is largely a product of the law of inertia which essentially states that an object will remain in motion or at rest unless acted upon by an external force in a way that changes the trajectory. So, if you need to change your trajectory, you’ve got to do a bit of a pattern interrupt.

And there’s another reason why this is so important and that is another law of physics, that basically states things that are similar attract each other. And it’s not necessarily just things, but also thoughts. So, when you’re in a state of overwhelm, when you’re in a state of frustration and irritation and worry and anxiety, chances are likely that you’re going to continue to think in ways that perpetuate that state and you’re going to continue to act in ways that perpetuate that state as well. And if you’re not getting results, you’re likely to continue not getting results and then fretting about having not achieved all the things you really wanted to do.

When you’re stuck in autopilot and overwhelm, try a pattern interrupt

When you do a pattern interrupt, essentially, the best thing to do is to flash forward and to start with the end in mind – to identify for yourself, what would it feel like if you were to get to the end of your day and actually accomplish what you set out to do? Can you imagine feeling that rush of gratitude, of satisfaction, of accomplishment? Can you imagine being able to end your workday and go on to spend time with your family or your friends in a way that you weren’t distracted by the things that were still gnawing at you from work?

Start with the end in mind

Take that feeling a step further. Try and identify – what are the most critical things that you need to have done today? And try to pick no more than three to five things that are really, really important to you. Now take some time to do a little writing – not about the tasks that have yet to be done but see if you can flash forward to the end of your day. See if you can envision that you’ve time traveled and that you’re already the version of yourself that has achieved those critical things you identified that are on your list.

See if you can write a note back to the current version of yourself, sharing with yourself how grateful you are that you were able to accomplish what really needed to be done and how much easier it was than you thought it would be, how relaxed and relieved you feel that you actually accomplished what needed to be done, and how grateful you are for the experience. See if you can capture that. Have fun with it, embellish it a little bit.

And when you’re done, go back to consciously starting your day from a whole different mindset and see what happens.

Bonus tip for when you’re stuck on autopilot

I can give you a tip that will help you to continue to perpetuate this new state of conscious intentional visioning all through your day. I encourage you to work in 50-minute spurts. Set a timer if you need to. Work for 50 minutes. See if you can focus yourself intently on whatever it is that you’re about to do. And at the end of 50 minutes, take at least 5 to 10 minutes to give yourself a little bit of a break. Get up and stretch. Walk around, maybe go outside, take some deep breaths, grab a glass of water, listen to some music, whatever it is that you need to do to give yourself a little bit of a rest and then to come back to your task feeling a little more refreshed.

And before you jump in for another 50 minutes, take a moment and review what you wrote to yourself – that letter from your future self talking about how great you felt after you accomplished all those things and get into that state of feeling. Get into that state of having already accomplished it so that now when you go back to actually doing it, it’s almost as though you’re reliving the memory of what it took in order to get there.

Try it for yourself

As I always tell people, don’t believe what I’m saying because I’m telling you. Try it for yourself and see what happens. I can almost guarantee you that you’ll accomplish a lot more than you thought you could just by starting with the end in mind, interrupting that pattern of autopilot so that you can be more conscious and intentional with your day.

A Simple Little Secret for Overcoming Inertia

Is there something you’ve been wanting to do that you just can’t get yourself to take action on?  You may dream and scheme and even have a plan for moving forward.  But for whatever reason you just haven’t been able to execute it.  Overcoming inertia is a common challenge, and it can keep you from living your dreams.  But it doesn’t have to.

You’re probably familiar with the law of inertia.  According to Merriam Webster, inertia is “…the inherent property of a body that makes it oppose a force that would cause a change in its motion. A body at rest and a body in motion both oppose forces that might cause acceleration.”

So, anytime you aspire to do something different, whether changing a habit or behavior, beginning a new endeavor, or creating anything – overcoming inertia is going to be a necessary and unavoidable part of the process.

It’s a powerful force.  Because it’ll lead you to believe that whatever you are about to do is going to be hard. And you may end up telling yourself stories that’ll keep you stuck.  You might convince yourself that whatever you are about to do is too complicated. Or that it’ll require too much work. Or that you don’t have the talent, energy, or wherewithal to endure it.

But what if the secret to overcoming inertia is to actually use the principle of inertia itself?

What if all you had to do to launch your new endeavor, habit, behavior, creation – or whatever you aspire to do – is just take some small action?

What if you don’t need to have it all figured out? …all your ducks in a row? …a multi-phase plan that maps every requirement, every step, and every contingency?

What if all you need to do is just START something?

Open a word doc and start writing.  Pick up the phone and make a call.  Go for a walk. Just get into action – and create new momentum – that is in alignment with whatever you ultimately want to accomplish.

If inertia is a force that leads us to continue doing what we’ve done before, by definition even the tiniest change in trajectory will begin to create a new force in a different direction.

Perhaps in this way, the smallest of actions can ultimately lead to the biggest of changes.

I experienced the power of this myself a few weeks ago, on a cold February day.  And on a whim, I filmed a little video to capture my epiphany…

FULL TRANSCRIPT

Hi, Diane Bolden, executive coach and author of “The Pinocchio Principle: Becoming a Real Leader.” And I just finished my morning ride. The thought hit me to shoot a video.

It’s cold here in Phoenix, which is crazy. I know. Wa, wa. But it was 35 degrees this morning, which is cold in Phoenix in February. And I did not want to get out of bed.  And I did not want to ride the exercise bike.  But I did it.

And I had an insight while I was riding that I wanted to share with you. What I realized is that it was hard to get on the bike because I was cold and I had to push through that resistance.

But now I’m warm. I’m actually kind of hot.

And I was thinking about how this is kind of like a metaphor for life… because whenever you start something new, you feel kind of cold.  And you don’t want to.  And there’s a lot of resistance.

[NOTE:  Starting something new requires overcoming inertia – the momentum of whatever you were doing before that may be keeping you from doing what you’d like to do next.  But… you can use the force of inertial to overcome inertia.]

And the more you give yourself to it – the more you allow yourself to kind of be in the game and push, (and I don’t mean push in a negative way, I just mean to get warm, to get your feet wet, to start something somewhere), what’s interesting is the environment doesn’t change…

It’s still very cold outside, and in here, but my body’s warmer and I have the ability to do things that I couldn’t do when I first woke up. And isn’t that just the same thing with life?

We start off and we’re cold. The environment doesn’t change, the circumstances don’t change. But if you allow yourself to get in the game and to get a little warm, and to move a little bit, you might find that you change.

And when you do, you’re capable of doing things you maybe didn’t think you could.

There Are No Missed Opportunities

 

Do you believe in “once in a lifetime opportunities”?

A lot of people will try to convince you to move on something because you’ll never have another chance…

Maybe you’ve even tried to convince yourself of that.

It creates a lot of pressure.  And when you decide to pass something up, you may worry or regret what feels like missed opportunities.  That can suck up a lot of wasted energy.

This week’s video will give you a different perspective – one that will save you a lot of frustration and help you to recognize that you may know more than you think you do.

FULL TRANSCRIPT:

Hi.  Diane Bolden, Executive Coach and author of The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed – Becoming a Real Leader: How to Unleash Genius in Yourself and Those You Lead.

Have you ever regretted not taking action on something?  Maybe it was something you’ve been wanting to do, but you just didn’t feel ready.  Maybe the timing just wasn’t right.  Maybe you just couldn’t get yourself to do it.

And then you might have beat yourself up or wondered, “Did I make the right decision?”  Because there’s so much pressure put on us for not passing up that “once in a lifetime opportunity”.

But I don’t buy that.  I don’t see life that way.  Experiences in my own life, as well as that of many clients I’ve worked with bear a different truth – life doesn’t give up on us.  And there are no missed opportunities.

Ancient philosopher/poet Rumi – “What you seek is seeking you.”  So, if you’re meant to do something, you’ll have numerous opportunities to say yes.  Like the waves in an ocean, one right behind the other.

Life prepares us for the grand things we do by giving us the not so grand little opportunities for growth.  And when you’re not ready for something, you’ll have chances to prepare yourself.

And ultimately, many grand opportunities.

So, if something you really want hasn’t happened, or if you’ve passed up an opportunity to engage with it, don’t despair. You’re that much closer to the next one…

And it WILL come.

In the spirit of there being no missed opportunities… though the spring session of The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed is now full, you can get on the waiting list for fall.   And if you’re interested in bringing the program in house, inquire at Support@DianeBolden.com.

Ever Feel Like Work is a Chore?

 

A third of your time on the planet is spent at work.  Why would you do something that makes you feel… dead before your time?

So many of us feel like work is a chore, which Merriam Webster defines as “an unpleasant but necessary task”.  It gets lumped in there with all the other things we dread but make ourselves do anyway ­– washing dishes, picking up the dog (or cat) poop, taking out the trash.

It’s interesting that Webster’s definition of the word “work’ has a similar connotation: “a task or tasks to be undertaken; something a person has to do”.

So, you could argue that the words “work” and “chore” go hand in hand.  And if your previous experiences validate a belief that work is a chore the association will be even stronger.  So strong that it leads to a common expectation that work is a necessary evil, a thing to be endured, something laborious and heavy.

Neuroscientific research has shown us that it is often our expectations themselves that shape our experience of reality.  And that can keep you stuck in a perpetual loop of believing that work is a chore and a resulting experience that proves it to be true.

Over time, perpetual loops feel a lot like hamster wheels – you’ll expend a ton of energy, feel a lot of frustration, and not really get anywhere.

(And if you are a leader, you may be unintentionally setting that tone for your whole organization.)

But you can turn that all around and change your world for the better.  It doesn’t require a lobotomy.  And it doesn’t necessarily mean you need to quit your job.  This video will give you a glimpse of just how easy that simple shift could be.

 

 

If you want more on revitalizing your work from the inside out, consider enrolling in the spring session of The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed: The Real Leader’s Guide to Accessing the Freedom & Flow of Your Authentic Genius.  This exclusive 12-week leadership development program is now in its 7^th year, with over a hundred happy alumni.

Participants for this video-based, small group coaching program are carefully selected and capped at no more than ten.  Registration will open on February 15^th, and priority will be given to those on the waiting list.  For more information or to be considered for enrollment, go to www.UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Feeling stuck? Refocus on your GOAL…

 

Research indicates that 80% of New Year’s resolutions fail by the beginning of February.  And if you’re thinking to yourself, “That’s why I don’t ever SET them,” you are not alone.

BUT… we all have goals and dreams and visions that are important to us.  And achieving them isn’t always easy.  If you’re feeling stuck or stymied, you may begin to get discouraged.  You might judge yourself or beat yourself up – which certainly doesn’t help the situation.

But the solution for getting back in the game and on the path to achievement may not be as difficult as you think.  Perhaps all you need do is refocus on your goal, or better yet shift your focus to something even more compelling…

This video is about getting back in the game after you’ve lost some of your steam – or when your best laid plans have gone awry.  I’ve shared from my own personal experience (one that seems quite common) what I’ve found to be the biggest derailer – and how to avoid and/or overcome it.

Why refocus on your goal?  Because your dreams, visions, and heartfelt intentions are too important to let feeling stuck get in the way.  Watch the video to learn a powerful approach for getting out of the mire and back on the road to success.

And if you’d like more guidance on how to follow through on your most important intentions, visions and dreams – download my special report: Why Real Leaders Don’t Set Goals… (and what they do instead). 

You’ll learn:

1.) why goals in and of themselves are insufficient

2.) a simple, compelling, and far more effective approach to achievement

3.) how to minimize the chance that your plans will be derailed

4.) how to master your mindset to achieve your dreams.

 Here’s to your success!