Miracles in Disguise: How the worst things that happen to you can become some of the best

 

 

I’ve worked with a handful of clients who unexpectedly lost their jobs after working for over twenty years with the same company. The funny thing is these people knew they were ready for something greater before it happened. In coaching meetings, they’d often talk about wanting to strike out in new directions, take on bigger challenges, live and lead in a deeper and bolder ways than before. And few of them would have likely sought out new opportunities if things hadn’t worked out the way they did.

In the midst of the changes, it’s likely that they felt as though their universes were falling apart. Much of what was familiar was ending as they were thrust into a world where nothing was certain and forced to begin again. They were brought face to face with the question, “what do I most want for myself now?” and challenged to take action that would lead them in new directions.

It seems more of us are asking the question, “What do I most want for myself?” Some feel ready for new adventures. Others long for deeper connections with people. Many just want to experience the same passion for their work and their lives that they did when they were younger – to feel a part of something bigger than themselves, to work at something worth working for, and to bring more of their true talent and gifts into the world.

And the world needs those talents and gifts more now than ever.

When we come to a place where we’re willing to open ourselves to the question of what we most want, we set into motion a series of events that bring the answers we seek. And sometimes they come in packages we don’t immediately appreciate.

But as we look back on our lives, we can begin to see that the very things that frustrated and pushed us to our limits were exactly what we needed to know more about who we are and what we are here to do.

As Thanksgiving nears, I’m grateful not only for my many blessings but also for my unanswered prayers – those that would have led me in a direction that wouldn’t have served me or others in quite the same way.

I am grateful for the difficult people in my life, who have challenged me to look at things (including myself) differently and find new ways of relating. I am thankful for the trials I didn’t think I could endure and the resilience and courage I was able to tap into because of them. And I am grateful that over time I have been able to laugh at the things that happen to me as well – and for the people who have been there (or somewhere similar before) who have laughed (and sometimes cried) right along with me.

I am grateful for every client I have ever worked with who has given me the opportunity to learn from their experiences and to see one more example of the strange and wonderful ways that miracles manifest themselves in everyday life.

I wish for you (and myself) the ability to always appreciate the blessings that always surround us – the ones that lift us up as well as the ones that seem to strike us down. And to open ourselves to the ways every one of them has the transformational power to bring us closer to our most precious dreams and visions.

Happy Thanksgiving!

 

 

Why overwhelm can become a self-fulfilling prophecy – and how to break the vicious cycle

 

When you feel heavy and bogged down, everything you do becomes harder and more cumbersome.

You may think the way you feel is a result of your experiences, and that’s true — the more you have to do, the more overwhelmed you’ll feel. But the reverse also applies — the more overwhelmed you feel, the more you are likely to act in ways that exacerbate it. You might procrastinate, overcomplicate things, or waste energy resisting and worrying.

If you focus on evidence suggesting you’ll never rise above the way you are feeling, you’ll trap yourself in vicious circles where you’ll continue to see what you want to rise above and feel the frustration of being unable to break free.

In fact, your frame of mind with everything you do has a direct effect on whether the experience of doing it will be exhilarating and satisfying or frustrating and heavy. 

The stories we tell ourselves have a way of coming true. The way out of self-imposed traps is to start not with our experiences, but our thoughts.

The fundamental shift must come not in what you do, or even how you do it, but what you are thinking, believing and allowing yourself to feel about what you are doing. 

To that end, setting an intention or statement of your desired experience can be very powerful. If you want greater freedom and joy, more meaning and satisfaction, and heightened effectiveness, you must align your thoughts around enjoying those experiences before you even start.

And you need to become diligently aware of the degree to which your thoughts stay aligned with your overarching intention. When they drift, you can return to them, remember what you really want, and align yourself with the state you wish to be in again.

In this way, you can break the vicious cycle of allowing your experiences to bring you down in ways that result in more lousy experiences — and begin anew. Your actions align with your thoughts, and you’ll find yourself coming up with creative ways to simplify, get focused on what is most important, and get it done while enjoying yourself in the process – and sharing your joy with everyone around you.

Looking for a better way to lighten your load? Check out UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

Diane

 

 

The real root of overwhelm (it isn’t what you think)

 

What if you didn’t need to change your circumstances to get rid of your stress?

When something is bothering you, you likely seek out the cause and try to address it.  But when you focus your energy on something that isn’t really the root of the problem, you’re wasting your time (and likely increasing your stress).

This week I’m sharing a very short excerpt from a webinar that will explain how to avoid that trap and get to the root of your stress, frustration, overwhelm or anxiety so you the effort, time and energy you spend addressing it actually pays off.

If you’d like more support on overcoming overwhelm, overwork and burnout, visit UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

Diane

How to outwit overwhelm (even on the verge of burnout)

 

How do you keep yourself from getting overwhelmed, overworked, and completely burned out?  While there is no easy answer, this week’s video will help you reach a turning point and begin creating a new trajectory that is much more likely to get you where you really want to go.

For more support, check out UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

Diane

Ever have one of those days?

 

You know those days… when nothing seems to be going your way. I filmed this video on one of them – to remind myself as much as you, what to do to get things back on track.

Here’s to your success!

Diane

P.S. If you’d like more on how to bring out your best (even when things are at their worst), visit UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Feel like something’s got to give?

 

If you’re near your wit’s end, running yourself ragged, or just feeling overwhelmed, you’re primed to make powerful change – one that not only helps you, but ALL of us to find a better way of both living and leading. This video will point the way forward.

If you’re ready to blaze a new trail, visit UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

How one exec moved beyond his limiting belief (and what happened next)

 

Curious to hear an example of how limiting beliefs can be identified and overcome? Here’s a story about a client I worked with years ago who successfully eliminated a self-imposed obstacle he didn’t even know he had created.

If you’re ready to get out of your own way, visit UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

Could you be in your own way?

 

What if your most formidable obstacles are between your ears? This week’s video will help you overcome them.

For more on how to get out of your own way (and lead others to do the same), check out UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

 

Diane

Want to do more? Start by doing less.

 

Want to Do More? Start by Doing Less

We are a goal driven society that is conditioned to seek more.

Our egos desire more money, more fame and prestige, and more stuff. But a deeper part of ourselves longs for more peace, more meaning, and more purpose in our lives. We want to move beyond our previous realizations of what we’ve already accomplished to master newer, better ways of doing things – whether that be what we create in our lives or in our organizations – and as leaders what we can inspire others to do as well.

What if you started with less instead of more?

Just for a moment, consider what you need to let go of to create the space for something new to come in.

You can take your cues from nature. We are officially in the first week of fall – a time of letting go and preparing for regeneration.  Trees shed their leaves, and the energy of plants is directed toward developing a strong root system that’ll help it make it through the winter.

As the days will grow shorter and we spend more time in the dark, it’s fitting to reflect on things you may not be able to see but feel welling up within you.

What are you holding onto that has run its course?

• What are the old, outmoded ways of doing things that no longer bring you energy?
• What things have you acquired that you no longer need?
• What beliefs are you holding onto that are no longer true for you?

In moments that you feel constricted, anxious, or tired ask what you can let go of. Don’t be afraid of the answer. Though it may be uncomfortable because it introduces an element of the unknown, following these insights will always lead to freedom and liberation.

Your computer can only handle so much data, and the same is true of you.

If you don’t delete old emails and files and continue to add new programs without uninstalling old ones, you’ll find that it becomes sluggish and unresponsive. Just as freeing up space allows your computer to process things more quickly, so too will clearing your own personal space (whether of things or thoughts) allow you to access new levels of clarity and creativity.

Space brings freedom.

You’ll breathe easier, be more present in every action and interaction you partake of and bring more of who you really are to what you do. And you’ll open the space of possibility that allows something to come in that may surprise and delight you.

Any work you do on yourself will serve as a form of leadership for others who, like you, seek their own answers and could benefit from your example of unearthing what is possible and allowing it to take form in new and unexpected ways.

Discerning what is and isn’t working and up leveling your game becomes easier and more fun when you have support. When you are ready to go deeper, check out UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Do you believe it’s possible?

 

The video below is a follow up to Tuesday’s video about a conversation that had me second guessing something I was passionate about – and why I now know that it was (and always will be) a truth that has the power to transform the way we work and live.

For more on work/life transformation, visit UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

Diane