Why Preconceived Goals and Plans May Not Get You Where You Really Want to Go – and What to Do Instead.

 

Have you ever noticed that even your best laid plans can fail to get you where you really want to go?

The reason SMART goals and the plans we create to achieve them often don’t match our desired future is that they are constructed based on an understanding of the present and the past.

Goal setting is a linear way of operating in a nonlinear world.

When you sit down and determine what you want to accomplish, how you’ll measure it and when you will have achieved it, you’re operating on a very simplistic and theoretical understanding of the way things work. You’re likely to assume the road you are traveling will be straight and smooth and that all you need to do is drive a certain speed and a certain course and you will get where you want to go.

But real life isn’t like that.

There are twists and turns. Roads dead end and turn into overgrown brush with no defined trails. What you thought would get you where you wanted to go may turn out to be incredibly inadequate.

If you stick to your preconceived idea of how everything will be when you embark on your journey, you may well end up stuck at a dead end. If you lean on the gas when you’re going around a sharp curve so you can meet your desired timeframe, you may end up flying off a precipice and landing in a ditch.

To succeed, you must abandon the past and immerse yourself in the present.

Navigating complexity requires that you transcend your preconceived idea of how you thought things would be when you started and adjust to the environment you find yourself in. Where you thought there would be one road, there may be five or ten. And a SMART goal won’t give you the insight you need to know which of them to take.

On the contrary, letting go of a misaligned goal or plan allows you to find new paths and blaze trails where none existed. It not only allows you to adjust to your environment, but it also allows you to adjust to your own growth.

Perpetual planning (and trail blazing) is more important than a plan of action because you cannot anticipate the future based on what you know from the past.

By definition, a plan is designed in advance of carrying it out. While you can take your best guess at how things will unfold and what the most fitting course of action is, you will not really know whether it is adequate until you have begun to act.

To harness the power of perpetual planning, get moving and build some momentum. As you begin taking action, you’ll get insight into what needs to happen next. Build regular time into your calendar to assess your progress and your plan, identify next steps and make necessary course corrections.

And when your map isn’t getting you where you most want to go, you’ll be much better off blazing a new trail.

The above contains excerpts from my special report, “Why Real Leaders Don’t Set Goals (and what they do instead)”

 

What if you don’t know what you really want?

 

Early in my career, I didn’t fully appreciate the power of having a vision for my work and life – and I think a lot of people tend to do what I did. They drift from job to job and go from one opportunity/ recognition/ highly visible project /mandate to the next, taking what life gives them and making the best of it.

When you ask them what they REALLY WANT, they’ll say, “I don’t know. Never really thought about it.”

Or, they may feel they don’t have the luxury of tuning into their vision because they think they just have to do work. Some may feel it hurts too much to visualize that beautiful version of their future because failing to achieve it would be more painful than never visualizing it at all. They don’t allow themselves to go there in fear it would set themselves up for disappointment.

I’ve come to realize that the real disappointment is depriving yourself the joy of embodying your true potential. And in the words of George Eliot, “It is never too late to be what you could have been.”

But how do you go about finding a vision that is true to you? 

Vision is something that comes from the inside out. Though others may try to impose a vision upon you, it doesn’t become real for you until it strikes a chord from within you. If you’ve spent a lot of time trying to convince yourself to do something that isn’t resonant for you, you may be trying to go at it from the outside in.

So, you need to interrupt that pattern and spend some time tuning into your own desires. Here are three suggestions to help you establish that connection:

• Consider what you find yourself drawn to, enjoying, or dreaming about? What do you want? And what will that give you?
• If it’s easier to think about what you don’t want, you can start there and contemplate what the opposite of that (what you want in its place) would look like.
• Reflect on what your most recent experiences could be preparing you for. Perhaps the hardships you’ve endured have provided insight into what you could do to help others find their way through tough times or to create what you most want to be a part of.

Tuning into your vision doesn’t mean you need to recreate everything in your life or quit your job. On the contrary, it will give you the clarity you need to make the most of your current environment and take action that will bring you more of what you want (and less of what you don’t).

It’ll bring the energy and enthusiasm necessary to move from being a passive participant in your own life to being the hero of your own story – and the kind of leader that helps others do the same.

For more on creating your vision and taking steps to bridge the gap between where you are and where you want to be, download my special report, “Why Real Leaders Don’t Set Goals (and what they do instead)”. 

Try Putting Possibilities Before Pragmatics

 

Think big. Ask yourself what the best-case scenario is.

What opportunities have gone unseized?

What possibilities are waiting to be ignited?

If you could wave a magic wand, what would happen?

Then ask yourself what is within your power to create, influence, or lead the charge for.

You don’t have to have all the answers, or even know all the steps.

You just need to start.

For more on creating your vision and taking steps to bridge the gap between where you are and where you want to be – and to receive updates on an upcoming webinar that’ll help you make the most of 2026, download my special report, “Why Real Leaders Don’t Set Goals (and what they do instead)”.

 

Do You Dare to Dream?

 

As children, most of us received mixed messages. You may have been encouraged to follow your heart and give life to your dreams in addition to being conditioned to be practical, hedge your bets, and take the safest route. Over time, many of us have allowed the roar of public opinion – that often tells us our dreams are frivolous, selfish, and unlikely to come to fruition – to silence that small still voice within.

But those among us who have risen against their odds have learned to reverse that process and believe in themselves and their dreams despite the overwhelming evidence around them that would suggest that success is improbable.

Listen closely to the silent whispers of your heart that beckon you to think bigger and act bolder – and to bust out of old paradigms that feel stale or stagnant.

Do what you can to gain clarity on what they are telling you.

And then take action.

For more on taking steps to bridge the gap between where you are and where you want to be – and to receive updates on an upcoming webinar that’ll help you make the most of 2026, download my special report, “Why Real Leaders Don’t Set Goals (and what they do instead)”.

How to Keep Your Goals from Stunting Your Growth

 

Ask any executive what their goals are, and they’ll likely describe targets they’re shooting for or milestones they aim to hit along the way. Goals are easy – they’re often prescribed or assigned. They’re logical, analytical, and concrete.

But ask someone what their vision is, and you’ll likely get a whole different reaction.

Visions are amorphous – they require us to go beyond linear thinking to engage the heart. Vision requires us to check in with what we really want and why – to envision possibilities that we may not yet know how to achieve.

And vision is what activates the energy in people and organizations necessary to persevere through the tough stuff in service to something meaningful and compelling.

If you compare a vision to a goal, it may seem like pie in the sky.  Visions are dreamy portrayals of what is possible. Goals, on the other hand, are rigid, time-bound, and practically pragmatic. We often place too much emphasis on goals and bypass vision altogether, which leads us to constrain ourselves and put a lid on what we could otherwise conceive and achieve.

What visioning offers that goal setting hinders is the ability to think big. It allows you to transcend what you believe is possible to envision a future without knowing exactly how you will get there.

And that is really important. Because if all you do is what you already know, you will fail to create anything innovative or groundbreaking.

The Wright brothers didn’t know how they would get their creation to fly. NASA didn’t know how to put a man on the moon. Martin Luther King didn’t know how racial equality could be accomplished. In each of these cases, it was a vision that stretched their minds and informed the steps they would take to make their dreams a reality.

Vision provides the guiding principle around which actions organize themselves.

It allows us to break out of our little boxes and illuminates answers and possibilities we may not have otherwise seen. We often find these answers as we go along and realize in retrospect that we never could have anticipated them.

Much like a river flows steadily toward the larger body of water that is its ultimate destination, vision propels us forward to find our way through uncertainty and uncharted territory.

A compelling vision identifies not only what you are moving toward, but also why. The bigger why provides you with inspiration you need to move beyond obstacles and other difficulties that would otherwise lead you to abandon your efforts.

You can find your vision with conscious intention and discernment. And if you are diligent in carving out the time to reflect on what is beckoning to you and give it the space to speak, your vision will find you.

For more on creating your vision and taking steps to bridge the gap between where you are and where you want to be future – and to receive updates on an upcoming webinar that’ll help you make the most of 2026, download my special report, “Why Real Leaders Don’t Set Goals (and what they do instead)”.

Harness the Power of Your Heart’s Desire

 

We are often encouraged to set goals before we even have a vision of what we want to accomplish. But doing so deprives us of the dream that provides the fuel necessary to achieve those goals.

As you contemplate the year ahead, consider the essence of what you most want to achieve, create, or become.  Perhaps it is not yet concrete, but rather an inkling of something that is calling to you.

Every great accomplishment begins with a dream and a vision.  It requires imagination and an openness to receive its gifts.  As Albert Einstein once told us, “Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life’s coming attractions.”

And imagination is big and amorphous – it’s not easily captured, quantified, or broken down.  It is something that must be welcomed and nurtured.  The reward of having done so is that it will reveal itself to you in ways that make you feel alive with possibility.

There is wisdom in your desire – even if you cannot yet quantify it, break it down in tangible ways, or even articulate it. In fact, sheer inklings and aspirations can become powerful seeds for the most innovative and ground-breaking accomplishments.

What is your vision? And how can you breathe life into it?

If you’d like more on how to gain the clarity necessary to envision and chart a path to your desired future – and to receive updates on an upcoming webinar that’ll help you make the most of 2026, download my special report, “Why Real Leaders Don’t Set Goals (and what they do instead)”. 

 

 

How to lighten, simplify, and infuse your December with ease and joy.

 

What if all the things you need to do this time of year could be lighter, easier, and more meaningful and fulfilling? Though that may seem unlikely, it’s entirely possible if you remember one simple yet timeless truth…

How you do things is as important as what you do (…maybe even more so).

December inevitably brings a whole slew of things to do that can tip the scales for people who were already feeling overwhelmed with work (and maybe even life itself).

It’s tempting to approach it all the way you would items on a checklist – just power through them in the most efficient way possible.  The risk of that, however, is that you’ll relegate yourself to a kind of “autopilot” state, where you’re going through the motions with your head and your hands but not really your heart.

And when that happens, the things you do can feel empty – for yourself and others too.

Never underestimate the power of presence.

I’m convinced that when people receive what we give them, they experience the energy we put into it.  You’ve probably had someone tell you to have a good day while looking at their phone or multi-tasking.  It just doesn’t have the same impact as it does when they look you in the eye and are truly with you, sharing a feeling and not just words that sound good.

The end of the year brings into focus what really matters in our lives.

November leads us to think about what we are grateful for.  December allows us to spend time with those we love, both giving and receiving in ways that create and perpetuate joy.  And as we move closer to January, we do well to reflect on what we most want to experience, accomplish, or become in the new year.

It’s a time that calls us to be present – and to pour our very selves into what matters most.

Honor what’s most important.

You may not be able to DO everything on your list (most of us never really can).  Instead, take some time to identify what is really important to you.

What are the things you care so much about that it’s worth slowing down to pour enough of yourself into them that people are moved by the experience?  Those things you give yourself to wholeheartedly will be the game changers in both your personal and your professional life.

So be intentional.  Start now.  Today. 

What matters most to you?  And how can you be completely present and intentional in a way that allows others to truly experience the magnitude of what you have to offer?

Because when you do, what you give to others will enrich your own life as much as it does theirs.

Do it because you LOVE it

 

This week’s video was recorded in the spur of the moment – when I was hit with an epiphany about what allows people to be both successful AND happy. It felt worth sharing, despite the background noise and absolute lack of makeup.

When you click on the image below, you’ll be taken to my LinkedIn page, where the video is posted.

While you’re there, connect with me if you haven’t already. It would be wonderful to have you as part of my professional network.

Here’s to happiness and success – and doing what you love because you love it!

Diane

Unexpected lessons from my cable guy

 

It was one of those days where I had way more to do than time to do it. And my internet was out. The cable guy showed up early and I was happy to see him, though I knew from previous experience this likely wouldn’t be a quick process.

David had a twinkle in his eye and a familiar way about him. Though I hadn’t ever met him, you would never have known that from the way he interacted. He made casual banter while going about his work disconnecting cords and dismantling equipment, the way someone who could do it in his sleep would.

He mused philosophical, reflecting on what a waste of energy getting worked up in traffic is and letting something that bothers you fester and occupy the space of your day. Then he went on to demonstrate in his own unique way what coming back to seize the simplicity of the moment looks like as he continued to troubleshoot the equipment.

Though my cluttered mind reminded me of all the things I could (should?) be doing while he took care of the job he was there to do, something led me to mentally set it all aside and join him in his reverie.

David told me stories of conversations he’d had with other customers who had apparently done the same – people who were getting all spun up had found ways to release their angst and see things differently after simply engaging with him. He relayed stories of being in the service and having the same kind of interactions with his comrades and superiors.

And he shared a conversation he’d recently had with his daughter, who was frustrated about the unusual quantity of rain we’d been getting over the last several days.

He paused to show me a picture on his phone of what appeared to be a placid lake softly reflecting the moon and stars and colored lights that hovered around it the way an impressionist’s painting would portray. It was a comforting scene of peace and tranquility.

“My daughter loves this,” he said. And I loved it too.

When his daughter had finished lamenting the inconvenience of the rain, he reminded her of that picture – something he had sent her a day or two earlier. And he explained that it was a reservoir they both drove by all the time, a sight which was quite unremarkable when it was dry.

He pointed out that the picture she loved was full of the very rain that was bringing her down.

David’s face beamed as he put his phone back in his pocket and returned his attention to testing the new equipment he had just installed, his work in my space almost done.

Every once in a while, someone or something comes along to bring you back to a place of presence. It’s an experience that interrupts the automatic and unconscious patterns that keep us from seeing beyond the mundane, trap us in our heads, and have us running to do things we’ve completely disconnected from without even realizing it.

David did that for me on that day. And I often reflect on the experience as a reminder that the people we interact with, the things we do, the very routines we engage with every day have a level of depth and beauty that we all too easily miss. That is, unless we make the decision to open our eyes, our hearts, and our minds to see beyond appearances and be in the moment.

Thank you David Rogers, for reconnecting me with the power of presence and perspective – and changing the trajectory of a day that may have otherwise had me racing to the end in a haze that would keep me from remembering what I even did.

And also, thank you for fixing my internet.

Miracles in Disguise: How the worst things that happen to you can become some of the best

 

 

I’ve worked with a handful of clients who unexpectedly lost their jobs after working for over twenty years with the same company. The funny thing is these people knew they were ready for something greater before it happened. In coaching meetings, they’d often talk about wanting to strike out in new directions, take on bigger challenges, live and lead in a deeper and bolder ways than before. And few of them would have likely sought out new opportunities if things hadn’t worked out the way they did.

In the midst of the changes, it’s likely that they felt as though their universes were falling apart. Much of what was familiar was ending as they were thrust into a world where nothing was certain and forced to begin again. They were brought face to face with the question, “what do I most want for myself now?” and challenged to take action that would lead them in new directions.

It seems more of us are asking the question, “What do I most want for myself?” Some feel ready for new adventures. Others long for deeper connections with people. Many just want to experience the same passion for their work and their lives that they did when they were younger – to feel a part of something bigger than themselves, to work at something worth working for, and to bring more of their true talent and gifts into the world.

And the world needs those talents and gifts more now than ever.

When we come to a place where we’re willing to open ourselves to the question of what we most want, we set into motion a series of events that bring the answers we seek. And sometimes they come in packages we don’t immediately appreciate.

But as we look back on our lives, we can begin to see that the very things that frustrated and pushed us to our limits were exactly what we needed to know more about who we are and what we are here to do.

As Thanksgiving nears, I’m grateful not only for my many blessings but also for my unanswered prayers – those that would have led me in a direction that wouldn’t have served me or others in quite the same way.

I am grateful for the difficult people in my life, who have challenged me to look at things (including myself) differently and find new ways of relating. I am thankful for the trials I didn’t think I could endure and the resilience and courage I was able to tap into because of them. And I am grateful that over time I have been able to laugh at the things that happen to me as well – and for the people who have been there (or somewhere similar before) who have laughed (and sometimes cried) right along with me.

I am grateful for every client I have ever worked with who has given me the opportunity to learn from their experiences and to see one more example of the strange and wonderful ways that miracles manifest themselves in everyday life.

I wish for you (and myself) the ability to always appreciate the blessings that always surround us – the ones that lift us up as well as the ones that seem to strike us down. And to open ourselves to the ways every one of them has the transformational power to bring us closer to our most precious dreams and visions.

Happy Thanksgiving!