I couldn’t find what I needed, so I created it

 

It was summer of 2004. I had 3 kids under the age of 7. I was working full time. And I was under the illusion that I could be all things to all people. It was a “success formula” that had helped me get ahead for the majority of my life, and I had doubled down on it again and again.

But it wasn’t working anymore.

I was the lead on several prime projects – stuff I’d always dreamed of working on. I’d been given a promotion to do high profile work. I was blessed with a happy marriage and beautiful, healthy children who I love more than anything in the world. By all appearances I was successfully juggling a multitude of balls in the air and seemed to have it fairly well handled.

What most people could not see is that I was struggling… working harder than ever but not really getting anywhere.

I was exhausted. My mind felt dull. Everything took longer. Decisions were harder. And the work I once loved began to feel like a giant burden that was sucking the life out of me.

I didn’t know what to do about it.

As a lifelong learner, I sought solutions that would help me out of my funk. The traditional leadership development resources not only failed to deliver but made me feel worse. I became even more compelled to keep digging the hole that I feared would completely swallow me up.

It’s been said that sometimes you need to create what you most want to be a part of.

I didn’t realize what I was experiencing back then was the precursor of what my life’s work would ultimately have me doing. I had to find guidance in less obvious places and learn to mine my experiences for the insights that would ultimately become keys to my freedom.

And since that time, I’ve had the distinct honor and privilege of working with multitudes of high-achieving executives who are having (or are on the verge of) soul sucking experiences just like mine – and those who want to proactively keep that from happening altogether.

Reflecting on what I’ve seen in my own life and those of the people I’ve been blessed to work with over the years has led me to a realization that becomes stronger each and every day…

The time has come for us to find and institute a better way of living, working, and leading.

That truth has guided me in developing my most recent offering, The Real Leader Academy. I filmed a 6-minute video about it that you can check out below. Be sure to watch the last half as that is where you’ll get all the details and a peek inside the Academy.

It is possible to do great work, enjoy your life both on and off the job, and lead in ways that inspire others to rise to new levels along with you.

Here’s to your success!

Diane

P.S. For more details on the Academy, go to www.RealLeaderAcademy.com.

Life is meant for more than checking boxes…

 

Can you remember the last time you were so excited about something that you could feel the hair on your arms or the back of your neck stand up? Or the giddiness of a five-year-old at the prospect of visiting an amusement park?

Maybe it got you out of bed in the morning or put a little spring in your step.

When the promise of a future state brings a smile to your face or makes your heart beat a little faster, lean in. Give yourself to the dream – and the dream will give itself to you, taking on a life of its own in ways that will surprise and delight you.

Author, philosopher, and civil rights activist Howard Thurman once said, “Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”

I couldn’t agree more.

Over the last couple years, I’ve been working on a passion project of my own – a career’s worth of seemingly disjointed but synchronistically connected experiences that have come together in delightful ways. You can check it out here.

What is calling to you right now? And how can you make the space necessary for it to reveal itself to you in all its grandeur?

Here’s to pouring some life into your passion projects!

 

Why SMART Goals are Often Dumb

 

Goals are something we are encouraged to stick to. But sometimes the goals we set for ourselves no longer match the direction we find ourselves wanting to go.

Early in my career I (like many driven professionals) was prone to setting SMART goals. You know, “Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant and Timebound”. It’s the conventional teaching we have all heard before.

But after time I came to realize that this approach leaves much to be desired – that in fact, it can actually keep us from getting where we most want to go.

When a goal no longer serves you and you stop wanting to pursue it, you may feel as though you’ve failed. However, the real failure might well be what happens when you stick to a goal that is no longer a fit with what you want, who you are, and the person you are becoming.

Getting where you want to go requires that you have an intense desire to get there. The pleasure and satisfaction of your destination — and your journey — needs to be greater than the pain and discomfort you will endure to get there.

What might start out as a very compelling goal may lose its appeal when your priorities change, and your very preferences and passions begin to change and evolve as well. Sometimes goals that were relevant and appropriate at one point in time will no longer serve you at another.

People grow and evolve at a pace that may not be aligned with the time frames identified in a SMART goal. When you lock yourself into achieving a particular goal, it can become a blinder that keeps you from recognizing and acting on a course of action that is far more aligned with who you really are and want to be.

If you are someone who regularly sets goals, take a moment to determine whether your current goals are working for you. Do they reflect what you really want? …how you are evolving as a person? Do they inspire you — or constrain you?

And whether you have set goals or not, consider the essence of what you most want to achieve, create, or become. Perhaps it is not yet concrete, but rather an inkling of something that is calling to you.

There is wisdom in your desire, even if you cannot yet quantify it, break it down in tangible ways, or even articulate it. In fact, sheer inklings and aspirations can become powerful seeds for the most innovative and ground-breaking accomplishments.

If you’d like more on how to gain the clarity necessary to envision and chart a path to your desired future, download my special report, “Why Real Leaders Don’t Set Goals (and what they do instead)”.

 

Harness the Power of Your Heart’s Desire

 

We are often encouraged to set goals before we even have a vision of what we want to accomplish. But doing so deprives us of the dream that provides the fuel necessary to achieve those goals.

As you contemplate the year ahead, consider the essence of what you most want to achieve, create, or become.  Perhaps it is not yet concrete, but rather an inkling of something that is calling to you.

Every great accomplishment begins with a dream and a vision.  It requires imagination and an openness to receive its gifts.  As Albert Einstein once told us, “Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life’s coming attractions.”

And imagination is big and amorphous – it’s not easily captured, quantified, or broken down.  It is something that must be welcomed and nurtured.  The reward of having done so is that it will reveal itself to you in ways that make you feel alive with possibility.

There is wisdom in your desire – even if you cannot yet quantify it, break it down in tangible ways, or even articulate it. In fact, sheer inklings and aspirations can become powerful seeds for the most innovative and ground-breaking accomplishments.

What is your vision? And how can you breathe life into it?

If you’d like more on how to gain the clarity necessary to envision and chart a path to your desired future – and to receive updates on an upcoming webinar that’ll help you make the most of 2026, download my special report, “Why Real Leaders Don’t Set Goals (and what they do instead)”. 

 

 

Do it because you LOVE it

 

This week’s video was recorded in the spur of the moment – when I was hit with an epiphany about what allows people to be both successful AND happy. It felt worth sharing, despite the background noise and absolute lack of makeup.

When you click on the image below, you’ll be taken to my LinkedIn page, where the video is posted.

While you’re there, connect with me if you haven’t already. It would be wonderful to have you as part of my professional network.

Here’s to happiness and success – and doing what you love because you love it!

Diane

Why overwhelm can become a self-fulfilling prophecy – and how to break the vicious cycle

 

When you feel heavy and bogged down, everything you do becomes harder and more cumbersome.

You may think the way you feel is a result of your experiences, and that’s true — the more you have to do, the more overwhelmed you’ll feel. But the reverse also applies — the more overwhelmed you feel, the more you are likely to act in ways that exacerbate it. You might procrastinate, overcomplicate things, or waste energy resisting and worrying.

If you focus on evidence suggesting you’ll never rise above the way you are feeling, you’ll trap yourself in vicious circles where you’ll continue to see what you want to rise above and feel the frustration of being unable to break free.

In fact, your frame of mind with everything you do has a direct effect on whether the experience of doing it will be exhilarating and satisfying or frustrating and heavy. 

The stories we tell ourselves have a way of coming true. The way out of self-imposed traps is to start not with our experiences, but our thoughts.

The fundamental shift must come not in what you do, or even how you do it, but what you are thinking, believing and allowing yourself to feel about what you are doing. 

To that end, setting an intention or statement of your desired experience can be very powerful. If you want greater freedom and joy, more meaning and satisfaction, and heightened effectiveness, you must align your thoughts around enjoying those experiences before you even start.

And you need to become diligently aware of the degree to which your thoughts stay aligned with your overarching intention. When they drift, you can return to them, remember what you really want, and align yourself with the state you wish to be in again.

In this way, you can break the vicious cycle of allowing your experiences to bring you down in ways that result in more lousy experiences — and begin anew. Your actions align with your thoughts, and you’ll find yourself coming up with creative ways to simplify, get focused on what is most important, and get it done while enjoying yourself in the process – and sharing your joy with everyone around you.

Looking for a better way to lighten your load? Check out UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

Diane

 

 

Feel like something’s got to give?

 

If you’re near your wit’s end, running yourself ragged, or just feeling overwhelmed, you’re primed to make powerful change – one that not only helps you, but ALL of us to find a better way of both living and leading. This video will point the way forward.

If you’re ready to blaze a new trail, visit UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

How one exec moved beyond his limiting belief (and what happened next)

 

Curious to hear an example of how limiting beliefs can be identified and overcome? Here’s a story about a client I worked with years ago who successfully eliminated a self-imposed obstacle he didn’t even know he had created.

If you’re ready to get out of your own way, visit UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

Could you be in your own way?

 

What if your most formidable obstacles are between your ears? This week’s video will help you overcome them.

For more on how to get out of your own way (and lead others to do the same), check out UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

 

Diane

Want to do more? Start by doing less.

 

Want to Do More? Start by Doing Less

We are a goal driven society that is conditioned to seek more.

Our egos desire more money, more fame and prestige, and more stuff. But a deeper part of ourselves longs for more peace, more meaning, and more purpose in our lives. We want to move beyond our previous realizations of what we’ve already accomplished to master newer, better ways of doing things – whether that be what we create in our lives or in our organizations – and as leaders what we can inspire others to do as well.

What if you started with less instead of more?

Just for a moment, consider what you need to let go of to create the space for something new to come in.

You can take your cues from nature. We are officially in the first week of fall – a time of letting go and preparing for regeneration.  Trees shed their leaves, and the energy of plants is directed toward developing a strong root system that’ll help it make it through the winter.

As the days will grow shorter and we spend more time in the dark, it’s fitting to reflect on things you may not be able to see but feel welling up within you.

What are you holding onto that has run its course?

• What are the old, outmoded ways of doing things that no longer bring you energy?
• What things have you acquired that you no longer need?
• What beliefs are you holding onto that are no longer true for you?

In moments that you feel constricted, anxious, or tired ask what you can let go of. Don’t be afraid of the answer. Though it may be uncomfortable because it introduces an element of the unknown, following these insights will always lead to freedom and liberation.

Your computer can only handle so much data, and the same is true of you.

If you don’t delete old emails and files and continue to add new programs without uninstalling old ones, you’ll find that it becomes sluggish and unresponsive. Just as freeing up space allows your computer to process things more quickly, so too will clearing your own personal space (whether of things or thoughts) allow you to access new levels of clarity and creativity.

Space brings freedom.

You’ll breathe easier, be more present in every action and interaction you partake of and bring more of who you really are to what you do. And you’ll open the space of possibility that allows something to come in that may surprise and delight you.

Any work you do on yourself will serve as a form of leadership for others who, like you, seek their own answers and could benefit from your example of unearthing what is possible and allowing it to take form in new and unexpected ways.

Discerning what is and isn’t working and up leveling your game becomes easier and more fun when you have support. When you are ready to go deeper, check out UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.