Master Your Mindset and Achieve Your Grandest Visions

 

Imagine that you’ve stepped into your car, turned the key, and shifted into drive. You’ve got your destination in mind, have charted a course to get there and are eager to be on your way. But when you step on the gas, your car only goes a fraction of the speed you were anticipating. Frustrated, you push harder. Your engine revs, but the car doesn’t go any faster.

And then you realize you forgot to take off the parking brake.

Trying to achieve your desired state without getting into the right mindset is a lot like driving with the parking brake on. No matter how grand your vision or bulletproof your plan, it’ll impede your progress and lead to frustration.

What is mindset and why is it important to achieving a desired state?

Mindset is simply the established set of attitudes you hold toward any given thing. It’s a product of what you are believing about yourself and others, what you (or they) are capable of, and what is or isn’t possible, among other things.

Your mindset is important because it determines what you see and consider to be real. And it determines how you’ll behave as a result.

Studies show that our brains process a small percentage of the data we take in.

To make sense of what is happening around us, we focus on what we believe to be true and screen everything else out. So, if you have a belief that something isn’t possible, you’ll give far greater attention and weight to data that suggests it cannot be done than you’ll give to information, encouragement or even proof that suggests it can.

And what you will experience is a self-fulfilling prophecy of sorts. As Henry Ford once said, “Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right.”

So, it’s important to be aware of what you’re believing about the things you endeavor to create, achieve, or become – as well as what you’re believing about yourself and your ability to succeed.

Often our doubts and misgivings are the product of messages we’ve internalized without ever really examining them. When you become aware of a limiting belief and the impact it’s having on what you most want, it begins to lose its power.

And often, when you take the time to examine those beliefs you’ll realize they just aren’t true.

With practice, you can interrupt old, worn-out thoughts that aren’t aligned with your desired outcome or behavior and substitute them for new thoughts that are.

And ultimately, you’ll learn to shift over to a new way of thinking, which will propel you into a new way of acting — one that will help you get where you most want to go.

 If you’d like some support mastering your mindset, consider joining me for my 7 week leadership development program kicking off on September 20. The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed Fast Track will allow you to break out of limiting habits and patterns and lead from a genius mindset.

It’s a compilation of approaches, techniques and tools that my most successful executive coaching clients have utilized over the years. You’ll learn to rise above stress and pressure and take your performance to the next level while enjoying your life more both on and off the job.

Reserve your seat at UnleashtheExtraordinary.com. Enroll with a friend or send a group of people from your organization and save $500 per person.

Here’s to your success!

Diane

P.S. Have you already been through the Pinocchio Principle Unleashed program? Alumni are eligible to re-enroll at a special rate of 80% off registration. And if you register with a guest, they’ll get $500 off the cost of their enrollment.

Email  Support@DianeBolden.com for group or alumni enrollment.

Is the way you’re working not really working for you?

 

 

I’ve been talking with a lot of people who feel like the way they’ve been working over the last several years just isn’t working for them anymore.  Can you relate?

Some had become accustomed to seventy and eighty-hour work weeks.  They were used to pushing through exhaustion, getting to the end of the day with nothing left in the tank, and starting the next one with very little sleep.  Their family life suffered, as well as their own sanity.

Work they once enjoyed had begun to suck the life out of them.

Covid brought things to a head for a lot of us.  We were reminded of our own mortality – of the preciousness of life, and our desire to live it fully.  It seeded a desire to seek greater freedom and fulfillment in our work and our lives and to create necessary change.

But for many (maybe even you?), there is still a compulsion to push harder even though you’ve reached a point of diminishing returns. Perhaps you’ve slipped off your groove and seem to be spinning your wheels, going faster than ever but not really getting anywhere – except more stuck.

If this is true for you, it’s not your fault.  We have been conditioned to believe the harder we work and the busier we are, the more successful we’ll be… and that slowing down to take care of ourselves is a sign of weakness.

Old habits, patterns and beliefs die hard.  But they can be replaced with better ones.

I invite you to participate in a think tank that is eager to find a better way, to unlearn old self-defeating habits and patterns and replace them with new ones, and in so doing unleash genius in yourself and others.

You can find out more about this groundbreaking 7-week leadership development program kicking off on September 20 at UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s what a previous participant had to say:

“I’ve really benefitted from the tools and approaches taught in The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed program and often found I was able to immediately apply a concept or tool covered in a lesson or a group meeting to something unfolding at work.  I’ve kept myself from falling into traps that used to keep me overextended and replaced old unconscious ways of working with better communication, prioritization, delegation and daily routines.

Integrating what I’ve learned in the program has also helped me stay positive and not get pulled down by things around me – and as a result have a beneficial impact on others as well. I’m living my life much more consciously and intentionally both at work and home and feeling so much happier, even as lines between work and family are becoming increasingly blurred.

I’m thrilled that people in my team have also gone through the program and will continue to do so, because I believe it’s helped us restructure and reinvigorate the way we do business to maximize our strengths and better serve our customers.”

Julie Patrick, Senior Account Executive, Employer Advocates

What if the setback is actually the springboard?

I used to believe things happened in a linear way – first this, then that; one building block upon another in a specific order; cause and effect.

I’ve since realized that achieving a larger vision or desire often triggers a chain of seemingly disjointed events that is in reality very connected.

It’s like watching a movie of a glass shattering in reverse motion. The pieces come from all directions, seemingly unrelated, to assemble into a perfect whole.

Each piece is absolutely necessary, in and of itself incomplete and incomprehensibly connected to a bigger picture.

There are often ups and downs and unanticipated occurrences.  And these seemingly divergent paths are absolutely necessary for us to experience the totality of our vision.

Sometimes we’re faced with trials that prepare us as leaders to help others work their way through those challenges – or to learn something we’ll need to know to flourish in our future endeavors.

We may not realize the significance or relevance of these experiences until much later, when in retrospect we become aware of the distinct reason we needed to endure any given challenge, setback, delay, or what originally felt like an irrelevant nuisance.

These obstacles give us a greater perspective on who we are, a larger appreciation for where we’ve been and where we’re going, and compassion for others who experience the same things we have along the way.

In dealing with these challenges, we realize that we’re far greater than we thought we were. And as leaders, we can help others appreciate and leverage their own chaos as well.

Taking the time to connect the dots of your experiences (even the disappointing or frustrating ones) can lead to some powerful insights about what life may be preparing you for.

It can also generate the resilience and regeneration necessary to work through those obstacles with greater ease and grace.

What’s irritating you right now?

Perhaps the experience you’d rather put behind you contains the very thing you need to get where you ultimately want to go.

The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed Fast Track program kicking off on September 20 can help you make the most of anything life throws at you – not only for yourself but also in service to others. Here’s what Karen Kurtz of Dolese had to say about it:

“What I liked most about The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed Program was that it gave me “permission” to take time out of my day to think about leadership, productivity, habits, etc. and really dig inside and reflect on obstacles that were preventing me from moving forward and the tools I could use to overcome them. The program goes beyond simple leadership principles and jargon and really helps you look inward into what you want and what you want to be. I would recommend it to anyone who needs to sharpen their tool belt and reconnect with their true leadership style.”

For more information or to save your spot, go to UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

Diane

P.S. Attend with a friend or colleague and you’ll both save $500 on the cost of registration.

Do you work for an organization that has a budget for leadership development? Download the business case for completing the program, which spells out seven powerful ways your organization will experience a return on its investment

Feeling constrained at work (and life)?

 

If you’ve ever felt like you’re at the mercy of your environment, you may be craving more freedom in your work (and your life). Do you ever…

…feel encumbered by everything on your plate and worry that if you slow down for a minute everything could come crashing down?

…experience pressure to achieve stellar success and believe you’re only as good as your last accomplishment?

…get preoccupied with what people – your boss, peers, subordinates, even your customers think of you and exert a lot of energy trying to manage their perceptions?

…feel constrained by corporate politics and compelled to say and do things to keep yourself safe, while holding back on sharing what you really think (or who you really are)?

Most of us occasionally think and act in ways that keep us feeling trapped because it may seem doing so leads to success (or prevents “failure”). But despite your best efforts, that automatic reaction will keep you from what you most want – and eventually suck the life out of you.

There is a wiser, stronger part of you that’ll show you a better way. It’s present and playful, creative and courageous, and capable of achieving extraordinary things.

We’re conditioned to keep this version of ourselves at bay, though it offers our truest source of sustainable fuel. We often don’t even realize what great lengths we go to hold ourselves down.

What would it look like if you let more of this side yourself come out at work?

Imagine a reality where you…

… are less preoccupied and more present, have clarity to efficiently and effectively get the most important things done, and access innovative solutions that would otherwise elude you.

…are buoyed by energy, enthusiasm and confidence rather than overcome with fear and doubt.

…worry less about what people think of you and enjoy stronger, deeper connections with people who are important to you, allowing you to have greater influence and stronger relationships.

…bring more of who you really are to what you do, allowing your organization and everyone around you to benefit from your unique perspective, talents and wisdom – and through your example unleash the talent and passion of people around you.

That is a state of freedom and flow. And it’s entirely within your reach. The first step is simply to envision what that would feel and look like in your life and open yourself to the possibility of achieving it.

If you’d like some support accessing and sustaining that way of working and living, consider joining me in my upcoming program kicking off on September 20.

The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed Fast Track: The Real Leader’s Guide to Accessing the Freedom & Flow of Your Authentic Genius is a seven-week leadership development program designed for high achieving professionals who are ready to reclaim their freedom, unleash their Genius, and through their example pave the way for others to do the same. Registration is now open.

You can read more about it at UnleashtheExtraordinary.com

P.S. Do you work for an organization that has a budget for leadership development? Download the business case for completing the program, which spells out seven powerful ways your organization will experience a return on its investment.

How to Break Out of Overwhelm and Lighten Your Load

 

 

Have you ever noticed that your experience directly reflects your state of mind?

When you feel heavy and bogged down, everything you do becomes harder and more cumbersome.

You may think the way you feel is a result of your experiences, and that’s true — the more you have to do, the more overwhelmed you’ll feel. But the reverse also applies — the more overwhelmed you feel, the more you are likely to act in ways that exacerbate it. You might procrastinate, overcomplicate things, or waste energy resisting and worrying.

If you focus on evidence suggesting you’ll never rise above the way you are feeling, you’ll trap yourself in vicious circles where you’ll continue to see what you want to rise above and feel the frustration of being unable to break free.

In fact, your frame of mind with everything you do has a direct effect on whether the experience of doing it will be exhilarating and satisfying or frustrating and heavy. 

The stories we tell ourselves have a way of coming true. The way out of the traps we set for ourselves is to start not with our experiences, but our thoughts.

The fundamental shift must come not in what you do, or even how you do it, but what you are thinking, believing and allowing yourself to feel about what you are doing. 

To that end, setting an intention or statement of your desired experience can be very powerful. If you want greater freedom and joy, more meaning and satisfaction, and heightened effectiveness, you must align your thoughts around enjoying those experiences before you even start.

And you need to become diligently aware of the degree to which your thoughts stay aligned with your overarching intention. When they drift, you can return to them, remember what you really want, and align yourself with the state you wish to be in again.

In this way, you can break the vicious cycle of allowing your experiences to bring you down in ways that result in more lousy experiences — and begin anew. Your actions align with your thoughts, and you’ll find yourself coming up with creative ways to simplify, get focused on what is most important, and get it done while enjoying yourself in the process – and sharing your joy with everyone around you.

Looking for a better way to lighten your load?

Check out The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed Fast Track: The Real Leader’s Guide to Accessing the Freedom & Flow of Your Authentic Genius, an exclusive 7-week leadership development program designed to help high achieving (and often overextended) leaders minimize pressure and stress so they can access their best work — and enjoy their lives more both on and off the job.

Registration for the fall session is now open! The program will kick off on Friday 9/20 and go through November 1. Visit UnleashtheExtraordinary.com for more information or to reserve your seat.

Harness the Power of Your Heart’s Desire

 

Consider the essence of what you most want to achieve, create, or become.  Perhaps it is not yet concrete, but rather an inkling of something that is calling to you.

Every great accomplishment begins with a dream and a vision.  It requires imagination and an openness to receive its gifts.  As Albert Einstein once told us, “Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life’s coming attractions.”

And imagination is big and amorphous – it’s not easily captured, quantified, or broken down.  It is something that must be welcomed and nurtured.  The reward of having done so is that it will reveal itself to you in ways that make you feel alive with possibility.

We are often encouraged to set goals before we even have a vision of what we want to accomplish. But doing so deprives us of the dream that provides the fuel necessary to achieve those goals.

There is wisdom in your desire – even if you cannot yet quantify it, break it down in tangible ways, or even articulate it. In fact, sheer inklings and aspirations can become powerful seeds for the most innovative and ground-breaking accomplishments.

What is your vision? And how can you breathe life into it?

If you’d like more on how to gain the clarity necessary to envision and chart a path to your desired future, download my special report, “Why Real Leaders Don’t Set Goals (and what they do instead)”. 

Life is meant for more than checking boxes…

 

Can you remember the last time you were so excited about something that you could feel the hair on your arms or the back of your neck stand up? Or the giddiness of a five-year-old at the prospect of visiting an amusement park?

Maybe it got you out of bed in the morning or put a little spring in your step.

When the promise of a future state brings a smile to your face or makes your heart beat a little faster, lean in. Give yourself to the dream – and the dream will give itself to you, taking on a life of its own in ways that will surprise and delight you.

Author, philosopher, and civil rights activist Howard Thurman once said, “Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”

I couldn’t agree more.

What is calling to you right now? And how can you make the space necessary for it to reveal itself to you in all its grandeur?

Why SMART Goals are Often Dumb

 

Early in my career I (like many driven professionals) was prone to setting SMART goals. You know, “Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Timebound”. It’s the conventional teaching we have all heard before.

But after time I came to realize that this approach leaves much to be desired – that in fact, it can actually keep us from getting where we most want to go.

Goals are something we’re encouraged to stick to. But sometimes the goals we set for ourselves no longer match the direction we find ourselves wanting to go.

When a goal no longer serves you and you stop wanting to pursue it, you may feel as though you’ve failed. However, the real failure might well be what happens when you stick to a goal that is no longer a fit with what you want, who you are, and the person you are becoming.

Getting where you want to go requires that you have an intense desire to get there. The pleasure and satisfaction of your destination — and your journey — need to be greater than the pain and discomfort you will endure to get there.

What might start as a very compelling goal may lose its appeal when your priorities change, and your very preferences and passions begin to change and evolve as well. Sometimes goals that were relevant and appropriate at one point in time will no longer serve you at another.

People grow and evolve at a pace that may not be aligned with the time frames identified in a SMART goal. When you lock yourself into achieving a particular goal, it can become a blinder that keeps you from recognizing and acting on a course of action that is far more aligned with who you really are and want to be.

If you are someone who regularly sets goals, take a moment to determine whether your current goals are working for you. Do they reflect what you really want? …how you are evolving as a person? Do they inspire you — or constrain you?

And whether you have set goals or not, consider the essence of what you most want to achieve, create, or become. Perhaps it is not yet concrete, but rather an inkling of something that is calling to you.

There is wisdom in your desire, even if you cannot yet quantify it, break it down in tangible ways, or even articulate it. In fact, sheer inklings and aspirations can become powerful seeds for the most innovative and ground-breaking accomplishments.

If you’d like more on how to gain the clarity necessary to envision and chart a path to your desired future, download my special report, “Why Real Leaders Don’t Set Goals (and what they do instead)”.

From DOING to DONE: The Power of Simplicity & Focus

 

You’ve carved out the time, eliminated the distractions, and sat yourself down to finally do that important work you’ve been meaning to get to.  But you just can’t get yourself to start.

Suddenly, all manner of things become more appealing… checking your inbox, thinking about what you’ll eat for lunch (or dinner), reorganizing the piles on your desk.

Before you know it, your time is up, and you feel like you haven’t really accomplished much.

If that sounds familiar, you aren’t alone. I’ve been there too. And I work with executives all the time who have similar experiences.

One of the most common assumptions people have that keeps them from executing is that they won’t be able to do justice to the work in the time they have.  And when projects are large, sometimes they don’t even know where to start.

A confused mind is not a productive one. So, see if you can make things as simple as possible.

Break it down.

And ask yourself, “In the time that I have right now, what does DONE look like?”

Maybe you don’t have to have the whole problem solved or project completed. Perhaps you just need to do some research to find the answers to a few questions, make a couple of calls, or break out the steps you need to take moving forward.

If you can make the expectations you have of yourself realistic, you may find yourself more inclined to jump in (and less prone to distraction or derailment).

This is consistent with Victor Vroom’s expectancy theory of motivation, which has been a solid operating principle since the 1960’s.  There are three components:

1) The level of perceived satisfaction you’ll have when you achieve a goal.
Check in with your why. What is it about making progress on this thing you’ve set time aside for that is rewarding? How can you make it meaningful to you?

2) Your belief that the effort you put in will allow you to perform.
If your definition of DONE is about moving the needle incrementally forward versus having everything finished (or perfect), you can proceed with greater confidence.

3) The degree to which your performance will allow you reach your desired outcome. If you know the actions you take in the time you have will bring you closer to your ultimate goal, your desire to take that step will increase. (This is why many digital surveys feature progress bars that show how close you are to finishing.)

Never underestimate the power of simplicity. Sometimes you can do more when you focus on less.

Here’s to moving forward!

Diane

Sometimes Falling Back Allows You to Move Forward