How to Unlock the Power of Gratitude

 

Gratitude allows us to interrupt, if only for a moment, what seems like a perpetual condition of restless yearning. From such an early age, we become conditioned to always look for more – to achieve more, to have more, to become more. With such an orientation, even the fruits of our labor are not fully embraced before we feel compelled to run off and do something else.

Gratitude is a state of being rather than doing.

It is a matter of what we focus on. All of our striving and yearning keeps us fixated on what we do not yet have, but desperately want. It leaves us in a state of lack, feeling as though we must compensate for something. Gratitude reverses that and allows us to soak up and truly experience the fullness of what is already ours. In gratitude, we can fully appreciate the richness of life around us – no matter what it looks like. From that state, we can more fully connect with those we love and appreciate and truly enjoy each moment as it unfolds.

Soon the day we call Thanksgiving will be upon us.

It brings with it the opportunity to celebrate – if only for a day – the richness and bounty that is ours. But this state of appreciation and celebration does not need to stop after the day is done.

For all that we want, there is much that we already have.

When you shift your mind into a state of gratitude, you are likely to act in ways that bring more to be thankful for. As you love and appreciate the important people in your life, you become more lovable. As you give your time and attention to others, you realize there is a place within you from which you have much more to give. Even with the things you really want in life, you can begin to realize the small (and big ways) in which those things are already here – and be fully present to the way they are already unfolding, trusting in life’s beautiful mystery.

No matter who you are or what your life is like, you have something to be grateful for.

It has been said that whatever your place your attention, energy, and focus on will expand. Perhaps this is the true art and power of gratitude – our ability to be in a place of joy and abundance and magnify it in such a way that it truly enhances the quality of our own lives, and everyone around us as well.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Diane

P.S. If you find yourself in an environment that is difficult to appreciate or feel that what you really want is a change of some sort, gratitude might be a difficult place to start to begin crafting your desired future.  I work with high achieving executives every day through a curriculum-based coaching program and via one-on-one coaching to help them leverage their experiences to move closer to their ideal vision so they can make a bigger impact doing meaningful, inspiring work and enjoy their lives more – both on and off the job. Message me if you’d like more information.

3 Fundamental Truths to Help You Become What You Most Admire

When Halloween rolls around, it invites the question: if you could be anything for one evening, what would it be?

The tradition invokes a feeling of fantasy. Whether your answer is a super hero or a villain or something in between, the very act of asking the question and imagining a response reminds us that we have the ability, even if for a simple costume party, to explore aspects of ourselves that want to be expressed.

And the invitation to step into a new way of experiencing the world (or projecting what the world experiences of us) doesn’t have to wait for Halloween or stop when it’s over.

Have you ever secretly dreamed of becoming something different than what you are right now? Maybe you’d like to be more of a strategic player, become more visible, make a bigger impact, or lead more people. Perhaps you have visions of learning a new skill, working in a different industry, or serving a different customer base. Or maybe you’d simply like to step into a new way of living and leading – one that allows you to be more confident, calm, and engaging, or less stressed, pressured and anxious.

Regardless of the change you seek, you would not have the desire if you didn’t also have the capability to achieve it. As Napolean Hill once told us, “Whatever you can conceive and believe, you can achieve.” Moving from thought to reality requires that we embrace three simple, yet powerful truths:

• You don’t have to be born with an innate talent to do something in order to learn it,
• You don’t have to eliminate anxiety and doubt in order to perform well, and
• You don’t have to sacrifice who you truly are in order to become who you want to be.

Let’s dig a little deeper into each of these.

You don’t have to be born with an innate talent in order to learn it.

On its face, this statement seems fairly obvious. After all, none of us knew how to walk or talk when we were babies. Many of the things you know how to do today were things you had no idea how to approach at some point in your past. While it is true that some of the things you learned over the course of your life came more easily to you than others, with practice and persistence you were able to increase your proficiency and improve your desired results.

You may think you don’t have the aptitude to learn or become certain things. But the problem may be more in what you are believing than anything. In her ground-breaking book Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, Carol Dweck discusses two different approaches to learning a new skill. Some people operate from a “fixed mindset”, considering talent to be an inborn trait for some (but not others). Others operate with a “growth mindset” which allows for the possibility of learning something that doesn’t come naturally to them. Her research shows that those in the latter group consistently outperform those in the former.

The fundamental difference comes in how those mindsets impact your behavior. With a fixed mindset, you’ll dread failure because you believe it is a reflection of your innate abilities. However, with a growth mindset you’ll be more likely to see things not going well at first as an opportunity to learn and grow in ways that improve your performance. A fixed mindset will lead you to quit before you even start, while a growth mindset will impel you to continue to practice, learn and improve.

The words of Henry Ford come to mind, whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.

But that doesn’t mean it will come easily, which leads to the next fundamental truth we must embrace.

You don’t have to eliminate anxiety and doubt in order to perform well.

Chances are that whatever you aspire to become is something that is beyond your current zone of comfort. If it wasn’t, you’d already be doing it. As I wrote in The Pinocchio Principle: Becoming a Real Leader, anytime you endeavor to make a change in your life, you will be met with resistance. Whether that resistance takes the form of anxiety or doubt or plain old yellow-bellied fear, no amount of careful learning and preparation will completely alleviate it.

Many of us (myself included) have spent years attempting to hone and refine our skill from a mental level before ever attempting to execute. The irony is the that most impactful and effective way to learn is often to simply do. In doing, we discover what works and what doesn’t and gain an intuitive feel for what we need to adapt to achieve the success we desire. Through trial and error our skill and effectiveness grow.

But the anxiety and the doubt and that little voice in your head that incessantly rattles on in ways that lead you to question your ability and your nerve will continue. If you can see those feelings as signs of progress that you are stepping up your game, you can perform in spite of them – and maybe even begin to appreciate them.

You can also learn to recognize that little nagging voice for what it is: a product of your thoughts and nothing more. As you stop giving it so much of your energy and attention, you may find that you can coexist with it in the same way you tolerate any other irritating but seemingly harmless disturbances, like a rattle in your car or an annoying commercial on the radio.

Sometimes that little voice will ask, “who do you think you are?” which leads us to the third fundamental truth we must embrace to move from desire to reality.

You don’t have to sacrifice who you truly are in order to become who you want to be.

The idea of dressing up implies that we are putting on a mask that eclipses our true identify. But often the things we desire to explore are actually innate parts of ourselves that are ready to emerge. We are drawn to people who exemplify the qualities we want to emulate. Sometimes we are even envious of them.

It is important to honor our own evolution by giving credence to our desire to grow and change and allowing those desires to guide us. They key to being authentic and true to ourselves is to listen to the beat of our own drummer rather than allowing the sheer force of our accumulated patterns, habits and the expectations of others determine our identity. Often the way we have behaved or expressed ourselves over the course of our lives is more a product of what we’ve always done than who we truly are.

So when the idea of trying something new, or exploring a different way of showing up in the world is appealing to you, indulge yourself and see what happens. Finding your own authentic expression is a matter of fine tuning. Try something and see how it feels. You can start by emulating what someone else has done. And then add your own twist. Let go of or tweak what doesn’t work and do more of what feels good to you.

This is what the most impactful of leaders have done throughout the course of history. They start by leading themselves – listening and indulging the desires of their hearts, believing in their ability to grow, evolve and achieve, and finding their own unique expression. And in so doing, they serve as leaders to the rest of us.

So don’t let the fantasy and fun of Halloween stop when October ends. Ask yourself what you’d most like to become and don’t be afraid to see where it takes you. In the words of George Eliot, “It is never too late to be what you could have been.”

If you are interested in more strategies for getting clarity on what you would most like to accomplish, create or become, as well as steps to help you close the gap between desire and reality, download my special report, Why Real Leaders Don’t Set Goals (and what they do instead).

The One Gift Everyone Needs Most (and No One Gets Enough Of)

 

Regardless of your holiday budget, there’s a gift you can share that transcends all others and won’t cost you a thing. One could argue it’s the one thing that no one gets enough of and everyone needs the most…

It’s the gift of presence, a state that allows us to truly bring out the best in ourselves so that we can do the same for others.

When you give presence, everyone benefits – including you.

You can experience it wherever you are — whether in a meeting, running an errand, sitting at your desk, or in a conversation. It has the power to transform the way you experience your daily life and what it allows you to create for yourself and others — without really DOING anything at all.

Can you recall the last time you felt totally and completely attended to?

Chances are it wasn’t when someone was giving you advice or telling you what to do. It may not have even been when someone was serving you or watching you tear open a gift. Yet when we think of giving something to others our minds often immediately jump to what we can do, say or buy for someone. Many times, the best gift we can give someone is that of our presence.

What exactly is presence?

The word present derives from the Latin past participle praesse meaning “to be before one”. It’s a state of being that’s achieved when you’re truly in the moment, allowing it to unfold without judging it, labeling it, or getting lost in your thoughts about what it means or what you believe should be happening next (or instead).

Presence allows us to cut through the clamor of our preoccupations, worries and fears so that our true selves can emerge. It’s a gateway through which our intuition and inner wisdom enters and expresses itself. A moment of presence is a state of grace that allows us to receive powerful insights that help us make the most of our opportunities and rise to our challenges in creative ways.

It’s a gift that keeps on giving.

 In these moments of presence, you’ll experience things on a different level – one that allows you to respond from a deeper, wiser part of yourself. And when you are with others, listening deeply and making them the center of your attention you will bring out that deeper, wiser part of them as well.

This is why the best leaders have learned to become comfortable with silence, to listen more than they talk, and to allow themselves to become instruments that help others to recognize their own greatness – not necessarily through anything that say or do, but rather through moments of presence that are created and shared with others.

In a world where everything moves so fast and people often feel overlooked and unheard, presence is one of the greatest gifts you can give.

It has the capacity to transform ordinary everyday life into precious moments that’ll become treasured memories. And since it’s a gift that’ll give as much to you as it will to others, it makes giving as wonderful as getting – no matter the time of year.

Here’s to your presence! Wishing you and yours a beautiful holiday.

 

How an Attitude of Gratitude Can Transform Your Work – and Your Life

 

Though Thanksgiving is behind us, taking an attitude of gratitude into our everyday lives pays great dividends – both personally and professionally.  Gratitude allows us to see beyond life’s little (and big) trials and tribulations to find openings where we previously only saw obstacles.  It allows us to move past annoyance and irritation to find something redeeming in people and situations.  And it has the power to transform frustration into appreciation.

It’s scientifically proven…

There is scientific evidence that our thoughts and focus can influence our perception, behavior, and outcomes.  When you consciously shift into a state of gratitude, your heightened level of focus will allow you to see solutions, opportunities, and possibilities you might otherwise miss – and act in ways that free you from constraints that previously held you back.

Notice what you’re focusing on.

Your brain allocates resources to process information more deeply about whatever you focus your attention on.  And it will prioritize that information over other stimuli.  The process is called selective perception.  While it is natural to focus on things that exasperate us, allowing attention to linger there will likely lead you to continue to take in information that just further upsets you.  And in that state, your ability to effectively respond is greatly diminished.

Focus on what you most want to see.

But you can turn that around with deliberate and conscious intention.  The same principle applies, so taking in information that allows you to find something to be grateful for will allow you to see and focus more deeply on constructive elements things in situations and people that you can build on.  It’ll lead you to place your attention on things you can positively impact.

Make an attitude of gratitude part of your neural network.

The more often you deliberately shift your attention from frustration to appreciation, the more your cognitive and behavioral patterns become hardwired in ways that increase your resourcefulness and ingenuity.  This process, which involves adaptive structural and functional changes to the brain is called neuroplasticity.

So next time you find yourself annoyed by someone or something, find something (anything) to be grateful for – and watch how the way it leads you to respond provides you and everyone around you even more to be grateful for.

 

 

How to Disconnect from Work on Vacation

 

We all know we need vacations. Time to rest and recuperate, enjoy our loved ones and have some fun. But all too often, being away creates stress for high-performing executives who dread coming back to loads of work that has piled up. How can you disconnect from work on vacation so you don’t spend your time away preoccupied or getting sucked into email and phone calls?

Here are three strategies for accomplishing this:

(1) Make the decision to completely disconnect from work.

(2) Prepare people in your organization to handle things in your absence.

(3) Set and communicate boundaries and expectations in advance.

It’s not uncommon to come back from vacation feeling like you need another vacation. But it doesn’t have to be that way. If you approach your vacation with the same level of thoughtfulness and intention that you do with any project you undertake, you can turn that around.  These three strategies will help you create experiences that not only revitalize you and supercharge your performance but also increase the strength and effectiveness of your organization.

Let’s start with the first…

(1) Make the decision to completely disconnect from work.

We all know our electronic devices need to be recharged to work properly. And it’s a no-brainer that they charge more efficiently when we are not using them. However, we often fail to grasp that to replenish our energy, creativity, resilience, determination, and focus – we too need to go offline.

It is often our underlying (and unexamined) assumptions that keep us from truly relaxing.

We are conditioned to believe that the harder we work, the more successful we will be, and that taking our eyes off the ball (even for a day, let alone a week or more) can lead to things spiraling out of control. As a result, many of us have a hard time letting go. We approach our vacations with one foot in and one foot back in the office, checking our phones and becoming preoccupied with work. In this state of mind, it’s easy to get sucked back into anything that appears to be less than optimal.

Few of us realize that this belief itself is the problem, which is why so many struggle with how to disconnect from work on vacation.

It is often the assumption that we can’t afford to let go that leads to most of the stress, pressure, and overwhelm we encounter when we return from our much-needed breaks. Like our cell phones, which are constantly searching for a signal and downloading messages, we too are expending energy even as we try to recharge it. In addition, this belief leads us to become far more susceptible to distractions that take us away from what we are doing at the moment. It also keeps us from doing the preparation necessary to ensure that others can handle things without us while we are away.

Once you realize this underlying belief is the culprit, you can substitute it with a new truth.

Chances are that voice in your head that compels you to check your phone will continue to speak. But when you begin to see the fallacy in that assumption as well as the pain it creates, it doesn’t have as much of a hold on you. You can begin to entertain the possibility that disconnecting will truly serve you (and your organization) and act in ways that make that true. And when you fully commit to a vacation that allows you to go offline, you are better able to prepare in ways that make that possible.  This leads to the next strategy…

(2) Prepare people in your organization to handle things in your absence.

Most executives would benefit by delegating and empowering others more in general. Often senior leaders find themselves unable to act strategically because they get bogged down in operational tasks that they really shouldn’t be involved in. So, creating a plan to prepare others to run things in your absence will yield dividends for you (and your organization) long after your vacation is over.

Take some time to identify what is most likely to hijack your relaxation, and plan accordingly.

Identify people in your organization whose skills, experience, and passion are a good match for things you would normally handle yourself. Then take the steps necessary to bring them up to speed and put them in charge while you are away. Create and communicate guidelines that will help them know what to do in situations that would cause you the greatest stress, so they can make solid decisions without you. Taking these steps not only helps ensure consistency and effectiveness while you are away.  It also develops key players on your team that, given the right opportunities, can make a bigger impact.

When you return, follow up to help your people integrate what they have learned and build on it.

In addition to increasing their own capability, their fresh perspective may yield insights into how things can be handled more effectively in the future. Additionally, the confidence you place in your staff can go a long way in making them feel valued and appreciated. Implementing this strategy for how to disconnect from work on vacation will allow you to open doors to new levels of performance that benefit your entire organization.

(3) Set and communicate boundaries and expectations in advance.

Most of us are accustomed to setting up automated “out of office” messages in our mailboxes. But we often fail to communicate and manage expectations in advance. As a result, people can feel caught off guard and demanding of your time while you are away. Or, you can feel inclined to respond to something that really isn’t all that urgent out of fear of damaging a relationship or letting a ball drop.

Take the time to talk with others about your intention to completely disconnect from work on vacation.

Make it clear that you do not intend to check email or handle phone calls. Remind them of the guidelines you’ve set on what to do in your absence. And clarify your intention to use this time to replenish your reserves so that upon your return you can more effectively serve them.

When clients believe they will be well cared for and know who in your organization to contact for what, they are much less inclined to interrupt you. If you discuss in advance what things can be done before and while you are gone and what is better delayed until your return, you’ll be able to leave with the peace of mind that everyone is on the same page.

Don’t underestimate the power of your example.

Leaders set the tone in organizations more by what they do than what they say. If you interrupt your vacations to get involved in work, others are likely to feel compelled to follow suit. As a result, the energy of your team wanes, tempers flare, and performance begins to decline. People work harder than ever but don’t seem to get a lot done, or they burn out altogether.

When you apply these strategies for how to disconnect from work on vacation, you’ll exercise true leadership – showing others how to truly revitalize themselves and their performance by modeling it yourself.

If you want to learn to infuse your work year-round with the same freshness and inspiration you feel after a good vacation, consider joining me in the fall session of The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed: The Real Leader’s Guide to Accessing the Freedom & Flow of Your Authentic Genius.

Registration will open next week, on Monday, July 31!  Enrollment is limited and priority will be given to existing clients and those on the waiting list (click the link to join now).

There Are No Missed Opportunities

 

Do you believe in “once in a lifetime opportunities”?

A lot of people will try to convince you to move on something because you’ll never have another chance…

Maybe you’ve even tried to convince yourself of that.

It creates a lot of pressure.  And when you decide to pass something up, you may worry or regret what feels like missed opportunities.  That can suck up a lot of wasted energy.

This week’s video will give you a different perspective – one that will save you a lot of frustration and help you to recognize that you may know more than you think you do.

FULL TRANSCRIPT:

Hi.  Diane Bolden, Executive Coach and author of The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed – Becoming a Real Leader: How to Unleash Genius in Yourself and Those You Lead.

Have you ever regretted not taking action on something?  Maybe it was something you’ve been wanting to do, but you just didn’t feel ready.  Maybe the timing just wasn’t right.  Maybe you just couldn’t get yourself to do it.

And then you might have beat yourself up or wondered, “Did I make the right decision?”  Because there’s so much pressure put on us for not passing up that “once in a lifetime opportunity”.

But I don’t buy that.  I don’t see life that way.  Experiences in my own life, as well as that of many clients I’ve worked with bear a different truth – life doesn’t give up on us.  And there are no missed opportunities.

Ancient philosopher/poet Rumi – “What you seek is seeking you.”  So, if you’re meant to do something, you’ll have numerous opportunities to say yes.  Like the waves in an ocean, one right behind the other.

Life prepares us for the grand things we do by giving us the not so grand little opportunities for growth.  And when you’re not ready for something, you’ll have chances to prepare yourself.

And ultimately, many grand opportunities.

So, if something you really want hasn’t happened, or if you’ve passed up an opportunity to engage with it, don’t despair. You’re that much closer to the next one…

And it WILL come.

In the spirit of there being no missed opportunities… though the spring session of The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed is now full, you can get on the waiting list for fall.   And if you’re interested in bringing the program in house, inquire at Support@DianeBolden.com.

Feeling stuck? Refocus on your GOAL…

 

Research indicates that 80% of New Year’s resolutions fail by the beginning of February.  And if you’re thinking to yourself, “That’s why I don’t ever SET them,” you are not alone.

BUT… we all have goals and dreams and visions that are important to us.  And achieving them isn’t always easy.  If you’re feeling stuck or stymied, you may begin to get discouraged.  You might judge yourself or beat yourself up – which certainly doesn’t help the situation.

But the solution for getting back in the game and on the path to achievement may not be as difficult as you think.  Perhaps all you need do is refocus on your goal, or better yet shift your focus to something even more compelling…

This video is about getting back in the game after you’ve lost some of your steam – or when your best laid plans have gone awry.  I’ve shared from my own personal experience (one that seems quite common) what I’ve found to be the biggest derailer – and how to avoid and/or overcome it.

Why refocus on your goal?  Because your dreams, visions, and heartfelt intentions are too important to let feeling stuck get in the way.  Watch the video to learn a powerful approach for getting out of the mire and back on the road to success.

And if you’d like more guidance on how to follow through on your most important intentions, visions and dreams – download my special report: Why Real Leaders Don’t Set Goals… (and what they do instead). 

You’ll learn:

1.) why goals in and of themselves are insufficient

2.) a simple, compelling, and far more effective approach to achievement

3.) how to minimize the chance that your plans will be derailed

4.) how to master your mindset to achieve your dreams.

 Here’s to your success!

 

3 Things I Learned in My Garage About Navigating Change

 

Sometimes the greatest insights come to you in the strangest places.

In the midst of inevitable twists and turns, I found myself in my garage…

…surrounded by relics of the past and inklings about the future.

And I realized a few things about the nature of change – and how best to endure it.

So I filmed a little video to capture these thoughts for you…

 

Why Your Setbacks May Actually Be Springboards – and How to Leverage them as a Leader

 

Have you ever had one of those days/weeks/months where it felt like one darn thing after another?

It has been said that there is nothing more powerful than an idea whose time has come.

But these ideas enter into us long before they are ready to be brought into the world. They prepare us, transform us, and lead us through a myriad of experiences that allow us to develop what we need in order to manifest them.

These experiences are not always pleasant.

We suffer disappointments, setbacks, frustrations. During times like these it is easy to feel as though life would be just fine as soon as these turbulences subside. But what if these little disturbances are the very things we need in order to breathe life into these visions that lie within us?

How many of the world’s greatest healers once experienced some kind of malady that they needed to overcome on their own before they had what it took to help others through the same challenge? How many people transcended their suffering by finding meaning in it and then went on to help others do the same? How many leaders rose to great heights charged with a mission of improving an organization or a community after having experienced something that needed to be changed?

What does this suggest for you?

If your journey as a leader will require you to exercise courage, you may find yourself in several situations that scare the hell out of you. If it requires you to show compassion, you may find yourself in situations where you must learn to transform your anger into something more constructive.

You will continue to draw to yourself the experiences you need to develop what is required to bring your vision into the world. The blessing and the curse in all of this is that those experiences will continue to present themselves until you finally learn the things you need to learn.

We learn best through action.

Early in my career as an instructor and developer of courses and workshops, I realized that an effective learning experience required a balance of lecture and discussion with some kind of experiential activity that would allow participants to translate into action what they just learned in theory. Life has a beautiful way of doing this for us.

The funny thing is that in the classroom no one ever much seemed to enjoy breaking into pairs and triads and having to practice something they were not very good at yet, and the same thing seems to be true when those experiences present themselves in our daily lives.

But life doesn’t give up on us.

If it doesn’t go so well with one person or situation, we get another to practice on. And it doesn’t even matter so much how well we do with these challenges, as long as we show up and do what’s in front of us. We will continue to be given opportunities to choose different responses, learn from them and adapt our behavior once again.

Think about anything you ever had to learn.

You began at the beginning. You started with the easy stuff. Then when you became stronger and more capable, you went onto a more advanced level, where the challenges were tougher and you had to apply greater skill, muscle and intellect. You emerged from each of these lessons with something you didn’t have before. And you couldn’t have acquired it through any other route than your own experience.

Low and behold – there is order in chaos.

As I began coaching executives several years ago, the emphasis in my work shifted from trying to impart a lesson to helping people learn from their own experiences and see the perfect order in which things are unfolding in their personal and professional lives to help them get where they truly want to go.

The pertinent thing was no longer to give people answers, but rather to help them find their own and to recognize they already possess everything they need to get them through whatever challenge is before them. And this is something each of us can do as leaders to help those around us on their own journeys as well.

What is life trying to teach you or prepare you for right now?  

And how can you seize these opportunities in front of you to bring out your very best so that you can help someone else do the same?

“The future enters into us in order to transform us, long before it happens.” – Rainer Maria Wilke

For more on how to embrace life’s toughest lessons and come out on top, consider enrolling in the fall session of The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed: The Real Leader’s Guide to Accessing the Freedom & Flow of Your Authentic Genius, kicking off on Thursday 4/21.  This thirteen-week leadership development program helps high achieving leaders leverage their past experiences to create a brilliant future – for themselves and those they lead.  A few spots remain.  To inquire and/or register, schedule a brief call directly with me to determine if the program is the best fit for you.

 

Does Your Work Life Need Resuscitating?

I have always been amazed by the number of people who think of work as a necessary evil — simply what must be done to earn a paycheck. For so many who toil through their workday, the primary goal is to make it to the weekend so they can really live.

Going through the motions, working day after day with others whose hearts and minds they seldom truly connect with, they withhold the very parts of themselves that make them come alive.

For some it wasn’t always this way. Many began their careers ignited with passion and optimism, only to find that their flames began to flicker as they encountered obstacle after obstacle that kept them from achieving what they believed would be success.

Succumbing to the unwritten rules of the organizations and other environments they found themselves in, which suggested they needed to act or think in a certain way to get ahead, they may have slowly sold out on their dreams and relegated themselves to quiet complacency.

Many of us were not brought up to expect that work would be fun or gratifying in any way – nor should it be. That’s why they call it work, you may have been told. As a result, you may have never really expected much from your career or professional life. And as the saying goes, life has a way of living up to your expectations.

Most of us have learned how to turn ourselves on and off at will, in an effort to spare ourselves the pain of disappointment or frustration — or to maintain what we have come to believe is a professional demeanor. It is not uncommon to hear people say that they are very different at work than they are at home.

Those golden parts of yourself that you think you are protecting suffer when you don’t let them breathe and interact in the very realms that allow you to learn who you are and what you are here to do in the world.

You miss the chance to become a part of something greater than yourself. And the organizations and communities you are a part of miss out on the unique contribution you have the potential to make.

You can no longer afford to fragment yourself in this way, denying the fulfillment of your secret dreams and talents and downplaying the insights you have about what you can do to make life better — for yourself, and everyone around you.

As more and more of us feel the pain that accompanies the denial of our spirits, we have begun to realize that the time has come for us to bring the totality of who we are to what we do, no matter our vocation, title or role.

There are people among us who have the ability to snap us out of our trances — our states of quiet desperation — and help us bring more of who we truly are to everything that we do.

They can do this for others because they have done it for themselves. They are called “real leaders”. And they exist at all levels of organizations, regardless of their titles or roles.

Real Leaders inspire others to perform at their very best,

because they themselves are inspired.

When was the last time you felt inspired in your work? When was the last time you had passion for your career? What is it that allows you to feel a sense of wonder and contribution to something bigger?

If you have lost touch with that, do yourself and everyone around you a favor and take some time to reconnect with it. You have something deep inside that you are uniquely qualified and put on this earth to create or do.

When you were young, the energy of your dreams likely propelled you along your path — sometimes blindly, but it gets you off your duff and into action.

You’ve likely experienced hardships along the way and it may have felt at times as though you were failing again and again. Life throws you curve balls and you can find yourself feeling beaten down and doing what you can to just get by, running from one crisis to another and sometimes going in circles.

At some point, you will be tempted to check out and take an easier path – one that allows you to go numb and somewhat unconscious. It may work for a while, but over time you’ll begin to feel the misery that comes along with abandoning your dreams and letting your passion take the back seat.

What would it take for you to get excited about what you are doing right now? What is the bigger why of the work you do every day?  Who does it serve, and how?

If you can’t answer that question, do some digging. When you can connect those dots to a bigger picture, you may find that what you thought was insignificant is quite meaningful – and a vital piece of a larger puzzle you are meant to help assemble.

As you recognize your part and the value you provide, perhaps you’ll be inspired to bring a little more of who you are to what you do by playing more fully, being more present, and connecting more deeply with those who rely on you.

Your passion is like a hidden well with unlimited reserves – tapping that well will allow it to grow exponentially. And as you unleash it in your work, you will draw out something extraordinary in every human being that comes into contact with it. That is the essence of real leadership.

We are beginning to awaken to our unique calls to service, creativity and innovation. As you find ways to unleash your distinctive talents and passions at work, you will significantly increase the quality of your own life, as well as the lives of everyone around you.

If you are interested in learning more about how to revitalize your life – both on and off the job, I encourage you to consider enrolling for the fall session of The Pinocchio Principle Unleashed: The Real Leader’s Guide to Accessing the Freedom & Flow of Your Authentic Genius, kicking off the week of April 18th.

This 13-week leadership development program is designed to help high achieving professionals bring out their very best performance in such a way that fills them up rather than depleting them – and allows them to make a bigger impact doing meaningful, inspiring work while leading others to do the same.

Enrollment is now open and will be limited to 9 people. To ensure the very best group dynamics, participants are hand selected after talking with Diane in a brief chemistry call to determine if the program is the right fit.  If you are interested in enrolling, click here to schedule your chemistry call.