Miracles in Disguise: How the worst things that happen to you can become some of the best

 

 

I’ve worked with a handful of clients who unexpectedly lost their jobs after working for over twenty years with the same company. The funny thing is these people knew they were ready for something greater before it happened. In coaching meetings, they’d often talk about wanting to strike out in new directions, take on bigger challenges, live and lead in a deeper and bolder ways than before. And few of them would have likely sought out new opportunities if things hadn’t worked out the way they did.

In the midst of the changes, it’s likely that they felt as though their universes were falling apart. Much of what was familiar was ending as they were thrust into a world where nothing was certain and forced to begin again. They were brought face to face with the question, “what do I most want for myself now?” and challenged to take action that would lead them in new directions.

It seems more of us are asking the question, “What do I most want for myself?” Some feel ready for new adventures. Others long for deeper connections with people. Many just want to experience the same passion for their work and their lives that they did when they were younger – to feel a part of something bigger than themselves, to work at something worth working for, and to bring more of their true talent and gifts into the world.

And the world needs those talents and gifts more now than ever.

When we come to a place where we’re willing to open ourselves to the question of what we most want, we set into motion a series of events that bring the answers we seek. And sometimes they come in packages we don’t immediately appreciate.

But as we look back on our lives, we can begin to see that the very things that frustrated and pushed us to our limits were exactly what we needed to know more about who we are and what we are here to do.

As Thanksgiving nears, I’m grateful not only for my many blessings but also for my unanswered prayers – those that would have led me in a direction that wouldn’t have served me or others in quite the same way.

I am grateful for the difficult people in my life, who have challenged me to look at things (including myself) differently and find new ways of relating. I am thankful for the trials I didn’t think I could endure and the resilience and courage I was able to tap into because of them. And I am grateful that over time I have been able to laugh at the things that happen to me as well – and for the people who have been there (or somewhere similar before) who have laughed (and sometimes cried) right along with me.

I am grateful for every client I have ever worked with who has given me the opportunity to learn from their experiences and to see one more example of the strange and wonderful ways that miracles manifest themselves in everyday life.

I wish for you (and myself) the ability to always appreciate the blessings that always surround us – the ones that lift us up as well as the ones that seem to strike us down. And to open ourselves to the ways every one of them has the transformational power to bring us closer to our most precious dreams and visions.

Happy Thanksgiving!

 

 

Feel like something’s got to give?

 

If you’re near your wit’s end, running yourself ragged, or just feeling overwhelmed, you’re primed to make powerful change – one that not only helps you, but ALL of us to find a better way of both living and leading. This video will point the way forward.

If you’re ready to blaze a new trail, visit UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

Could you be in your own way?

 

What if your most formidable obstacles are between your ears? This week’s video will help you overcome them.

For more on how to get out of your own way (and lead others to do the same), check out UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

 

Diane

Do you believe it’s possible?

 

The video below is a follow up to Tuesday’s video about a conversation that had me second guessing something I was passionate about – and why I now know that it was (and always will be) a truth that has the power to transform the way we work and live.

For more on work/life transformation, visit UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

Diane

Don’t let them stop you

 

Ever have a conversation that stopped you in your tracks? This video is about one of those pivotal moments that took the wind out of my sails for a while – until I realized I could generate the energy I needed from a different source. Maybe you can relate…

For more on overcoming life’s potential showstoppers, visit UnleashtheExtraordinary.com.

Here’s to your success!

Diane

How to Work Quickly and Effectively Through Post Vacation Piles

 

You’ve returned from a fabulous vacation feeling like everything that happened while you were away has coagulated into an overwhelming pile that seems completely impermeable.

Now what?

In my last post, I discussed the second vital strategy for coming back strong after your vacation: (2) Take advantage of the opportunity to see things from a fresh perspective. A part of that strategy included identifying all the things that are competing for your attention. Not as a “to do” list, but rather an inventory of potential items to be addressed.

Getting things out of your head has a way of freeing up your mind. But that sweet release is quickly replaced with angst and anxiety if you believe you must accomplish all that is written there. That’s when overwhelm sets in and threatens to get in the way of action.

That leads us to the third strategy…

(3) Use discernment to determine your highest priorities.

Take a moment to get clarity on your most important desired outcomes. See if you can go beyond the outcomes themselves to dial in what those accomplishments will give you – forward momentum? closure? pride in your work?

Now, from that mindset, ask yourself the following questions,

• Which of the items listed are truly most important?
• What needs to get done right away, and what can be deferred?
• What MUST I do myself? And what could I delegate to others?
• What, if anything on this list, really doesn’t need to get done at all (or could be minimized in some way?)

Once you’ve identified your priorities, start with the most important. If you can focus on one thing at a time and bring all your presence to getting that thing done, you’ll do it more quickly and effectively. And then you can move onto the next thing with the same laser focus and intensity.

Remember, one of the important functions of taking a vacation is to allow yourself the rest, relaxation and recharge necessary to come back to your work with new vitality, energy and enthusiasm. It could usher in a whole new way to simplify your life and work and focus on bigger, more important, strategic ventures and initiatives.

Approaching your post vacation re-entry by taking the steps outlined above (and covered in previous posts) will allow you to leverage your time away to unleash new levels of performance in yourself, as well as those you lead.

If you want to learn to infuse your work year-round with the same freshness and inspiration you feel after a good vacation, message me to learn about a new program I’ll soon be making available to a limited number of executives.

 

How Your Vacation Can Keep on Giving (long after you return)

 

If you worry that taking vacation might lead you to lose focus or traction with your work, you’re not alone. But…. What if you could actually improve your focus, ingenuity and performance BECAUSE you spent time away?

Last week I posted about the first step for coming back strong after your vacation: (1) Take a moment to get clear on what you most want.

Today, we’ll explore the second strategy…

(2) Take advantage of the opportunity to see things with a fresh perspective.

Being creatures of habit, we tend to jump back into the same ways of doing things that led us to feel like we desperately needed a vacation in the first place. Going on vacation creates a pattern interrupt that you can leverage in your work.

In much the same way a new employee sees problems and solutions from a different angle than the more seasoned team members, your time away allows you to view your work with new eyes.

Notice what’s going through your head without allowing it to disturb your peace of mind. 

• Are you frustrated that things didn’t run as smoothly as you wanted them to while you were away?
• Is there a voice screaming at you to jump in and start answering emails, returning calls and/or wading through piles of paper before you lose another minute?
• Are you feeling burdened by the weight of what seems to be more than you can humanly process in the span of a day/week/month?

These thoughts are to be expected. We all have them. But they don’t have to push you into a panic-filled, adrenaline-provoked response that keeps you from being effective. A lot of our stress is a result of comparing what is happening to what we think should happen, which takes us out of the moment and puts us in a battle in our heads, adding unnecessary stress and pressure.

Instead, come back to the moment and see if you can simply assess it without judging. 

Be mindful of telling yourself stories about what it means, or what is going to happen next. Before you jump into action, do an assessment of all the things that are competing for your attention. Don’t think of this as a “to do” list, just an inventory of potential items to be addressed. Add to it anything else that you feel compelled to act on.

Getting things out of your head frees your mind to utilize discernment, so that you can sort through what would otherwise overwhelm you and identify what your true priorities are. In my next post, I’ll talk you through a way to do just that.

And if you want to learn to infuse your work year-round with the same freshness and inspiration you feel after a good vacation, message me to learn about a new program I’ll soon be making available to a limited number of executives.

How to Ease Post Vacation Re-entry

 

No matter how much you love your work, returning from vacation can be difficult.

The barrage of emails, phone messages and projects that often pile up can feel heavy, burdensome and downright overwhelming. You may feel soft and ill equipped to address them. After all, it took a while to settle those engines down. And there is only so much even the boldest of coffee can do for you.

But vacation re-entry doesn’t have to be a stress filled experience. 

In fact, when you approach returning from vacation consciously and intentionally, you can make the most of the relaxation you enjoyed in much the same way that you maximize any investment.   That precious down time you allowed yourself can put you ahead of the curve rather than behind it.

This week and next, I’ll be exploring strategies for doing just that. Let’s start with the first…

(1) Get clear on what you most want.

 The beauty of a vacation is that it allows you to get some distance from the myriad of little things that keep you from seeing the bigger picture in your life. You can reconnect with what’s most important to you ­­– and get clarity on what you want more of and less of.

It often happens on more of a feeling level than a thinking level. You may find yourself buoyed by possibility, even if you aren’t sure exactly what it is.  Time away ushers in new energy that allows us to feel life could be so much simpler, richer, satisfying and fulfilling.

Don’t let that feeling disappear just because your vacation has come to an end. Before you jump back into your work, tune into the bigger picture of what you want to experience and see if you can feel it as though it already exists.

Do you want more simplicity? To cut through complexity with confidence and ease? To infuse your work with more optimism and lightness?

How do you want to feel at the end of the day? See if you can go there and experience it now. Imagine yourself driving home feeling grateful for what you accomplished and enthusiastic about what is on the horizon. Then return to the moment and approach your day from that frame of mind.

Tuning into the mindset that will keep you in sync with your vision will guide your actions in ways that are most likely to bring your desired state to fruition. So, lock it in, and commit to staying aligned and returning to that conscious state of mind if and when something momentarily steals your focus.

If you want to learn to infuse your work year-round with the same freshness and inspiration you feel after a good vacation, message me to learn about a new program I’ll soon be making available to a limited number of executives.

Next week, I’ll post about the second strategy for coming back strong after your vacation: Take advantage of the opportunity to see things with a fresh perspective.

How To Set Yourself (and Others) Up for Success on Your Next Vacation

 

Want to get away? Of course you do. And you SHOULD!  Letting your vacation time go unused doesn’t benefit you OR your organization because you’ll miss out on ways to supercharge your success by replenishing your vital reserves of energy, creativity and resilience.

Over the past few weeks, I’ve shared strategies for disconnecting from work while you are on vacation so that you can not only enjoy your time away but also maximize your ability to return refreshed and ready to roll.

(3) Set and communicate boundaries and expectations in advance.

Most of us are accustomed to setting up automated “out of office” messages in our mailboxes. But we often fail to communicate and manage expectations in advance. As a result, people can feel caught off guard and demanding of your time while you are away. Or you can feel inclined to respond to something that really isn’t all that urgent out of fear of damaging a relationship or letting a ball drop.

Take the time to talk with others about your intention to completely disconnect from work on vacation.

Make it clear that you do not intend to check email or handle phone calls. Remind them of the guidelines you’ve set on what to do in your absence. And clarify your intention to use this time to replenish your reserves so that upon your return you can more effectively serve them.

When clients believe they will be well cared for and know who in your organization to contact for what, they are much less inclined to interrupt you. If you discuss in advance what things can be done before and while you are gone and what is better delayed until your return, you’ll be able to leave with the peace of mind that everyone is on the same page.

Don’t underestimate the power of your example.

Leaders set the tone in organizations more by what they do than what they say. If you interrupt your vacations to get involved in work, others are likely to feel compelled to follow suit. As a result, the energy of your team wanes, tempers flare, and performance begins to decline. People work harder than ever but don’t seem to get a lot done, or they burn out altogether.

When you apply solid strategies for how to disconnect from work on vacation, you’ll exercise true leadership – showing others how to truly revitalize themselves and their performance by modeling it yourself.

If you want to learn to infuse your work year-round with the same freshness and inspiration you feel after a good vacation, message me to learn about a new program I’ll soon be making available to a limited number of executives.

In coming weeks, I’ll share strategies for post vacation re-entry… 3 steps for coming back strong.

How to Use Your Vacation to Strengthen Your Team (and your organization)

 

It’s not uncommon to return from vacation feeling like you need another vacation. But it doesn’t have to be that way. If you approach your time away with the same level of thoughtfulness and intention that you do with any project you undertake, you can turn that around.

Three strategies will help you create vacation experiences that not only revitalize you and supercharge your performance but also increase the strength and effectiveness of your organization. I posted about the first strategy last week: Make the decision to completely disconnect from work.

This week, we’ll move to the second strategy…

(2) Prepare people in your organization to handle things in your absence.

Most executives would benefit by delegating and empowering others more in general. Often senior leaders find themselves unable to act strategically because they get bogged down in operational tasks that they really shouldn’t be involved in. So, creating a plan to prepare others to run things in your absence will yield dividends for you (and your organization) long after your vacation is over.

Take some time to identify what is most likely to hijack your relaxation, and plan accordingly.

Identify people in your organization whose skills, experience, and passion are a good match for things you would normally handle yourself. Then take the steps necessary to bring them up to speed and put them in charge while you are away.

Create and communicate guidelines that will help them know what to do in situations that would cause you the greatest stress, so they can make solid decisions without you.

Taking these steps not only helps ensure consistency and effectiveness while you are away.  It also develops key players on your team that, given the right opportunities, can make a bigger impact.

When you return, follow up to help your people integrate what they have learned and build on it.

In addition to increasing their own capability, their fresh perspective may yield insights into how things can be handled more effectively in the future. And the confidence you place in your staff can go a long way toward making them feel valued and appreciated.

Implementing this strategy for how to disconnect from work on vacation will allow you to open doors to new levels of performance that benefit your entire organization.

Next week, I’ll share with you the third strategy for disconnecting from work, so you can enjoy your vacation, return feeling refreshed and ready to reengage at a higher, more effective level, and set a powerful example for your people about how to maximize their own performance.

If you want to learn to infuse your work year-round with the same freshness and inspiration you feel after a good vacation, message me to learn about a new program I’ll soon be making available to a limited number of executives.